March 31, 2010

Wednesday Down

Work was not as busy today.

I didn't cry as often, and I know why. Whenever I felt the tears well up in my eyes, I would take a deep breath and think of something fun and/or funny Ghost and I used to do. That immediatley brought a smile to my face, and kept the tears at bay.

This is normally how I mourn. I have a good day or two of crying buckets, and then I start playing memories in my head whenever I feel tears coming.

One of my favorite past times with Ghost was when we would dance. He was tall on his hind legs, and I'm short. So he would pop up on his hind legs and I would hold his front legs, and dance with him.

Don't get me wrong, I miss him a lot. But I'm starting to be able to control my emotions and point them at happier times.

Once I got out of work MZ dropped me off downtown where Master picked me up and took me home. We ate dinner, and I had to run out because we realized we had no more toothpaste in the apartment.

Once I got back I took my bath and the Master and I exchanged back rubs while watching "To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything". That movie is hilarious.

Now we're just relaxing and honestly I'm not tired at all, although I'm sure I should be.

We cleaned the rabbit cages last night, so our three bunnies are happy.

I've decided to keep next Monday off. I don't have a lot of vacation days, but I want to keep that day off. I think Master and I could use the extra time together. Also, Sunday is probably going to be somewhat emotionally draining.

We are visiting my mother, which shouldn't be to bad. But after that we are probably going to Master's mother's house. And she.. well. She's very self centered and always finds a way to piss Master off. So yeah. Fun for everyone there.

March 30, 2010

No Title

Last night Master and I went to bed, and curled up tight before attempting to drift off to sleep. When I did sleep, I didn't dream and I didn't stir that I know of.

When my alarm went off this morning I sat up, turned it off, and thought about calling in again today. But I looked at Master, who was laying next to me sleeping, and remembered that He told me last night that He wanted me to at least try and go to work.

Well, waking up and deciding to call in last minute is not trying.

So I went into the living room and started getting ready for work.

MZ and AM picked me up. I cried on the way to work a bit. I'm not comfortable with crying in front of people, unless it's my Husband or my mother. Everyone else? It makes me cringe to even think about crying in front of other people. That is unless my emotions just overwhelm me so much that there is no containing it. They let me be, and stayed quiet for most of the ride to work.

The rest of the day at work when I started crying either I did it very quietly, or I went to the bathroom and shut myself off in one of the stalls. I took my lunch break early because I needed to gather myself, and I wanted some fresh air.

Master and I talked on and off throughout the day. I was honestly surprised that I didn't start begging Him to come pick me up. But I know we need the money, and I know that I needed to get through the day. I didn't want to make Master drive 45 minutes just to pick me up. So I toughed it out.

I'm proud of myself.

When I got home we had dinner and we talked.

I'm mentally exhausted, but I'm not tired. I know I need to get up early tomorrow morning, but I don't really give a fuck about that right now. I know no matter how tired I am, I'll drag my ass out of bed and go to work and down a lot of caffeine if that's what I need to do to get my job done.

Master doesn't want me talking to V (the really annoying coworker I am forever bitching about) anymore unless it is directly work related. She is not a healthy influence at all. All she ever does is piss me off, try to drag me into her drama, attempt to force her ideals on me, and stress me the fuck out. So while normally I can come home and make fun of her with Master. It's not worth the five minutes of amusement. At least not anymore.

So I won't be. Just because I work with her doesn't mean I have to pretend to be her friend.

In fact while I was posting this Master just quizzed me. "And how are you going to respond the next time V starts giving you shit?" .... "Not to talk to me unless it's work related, Sir." .... "Very good."

He just elaborated on why He wants me to phrase it that way. This way, if she decides to going to our supervisor and complain saying I'm giving her attitude, and he asks what I'm saying, it won't sound like I'm being a bitch. It'll make it sound like I'm focusing on my work, and she won't have a leg to stand on.

This is much better than how I would like to handle the situation. Especially right now. I would love, love, love to just lash out right now. But I can't. I can't risk my job over some piece of trash like her. *nods*

** Also, I just wanted to say thank you all, each and every one of you, who has offered a kind word, shared their experiences, and kept us in their thoughts. We both greatly appreciate it. I'm just not up to answering each comment individually.

March 29, 2010

Goodbye Dear Friend

Master and I couldn't sleep last night. We knew that in the morning we would be going to the vet's office. And neither of us wanted to make that trip. In all honesty, while I was laying there, I kept thinking to myself  "Please Ghost, don't wake up in the morning."

It's very rare for a dog to go naturally, in their sleep. But I'm sure it's what we all want for our animals. For them to go peacefully, while sleeping.

But our stubborn pup was awake when we got up. I had gotten out of bed at 7am originally to call into work. I then went and laid back down but didn't really sleep much. I got up again I believe about an hour later. Master was already awake.

We spent some time with Ghost in the living room. We then put him in the bedroom, where he always went when we left the house, and drove down to the vet's office. We were barely keeping it together as we talked to the vet assistant. She said that they had an appointment open at 5:30pm today.

So we scheduled it.

It was a little after 9:30am when we got back home. We spent the entire day with Ghost. We let him do whatever he wanted. If he wanted to be in the bedroom, we let him go back there. If he wanted to bark, we let him bark. In fact we told him to give our neighbors hell when they slammed their doors. Whatever he wanted to do, that's exactly what he did.

We both cried on and off throughout the day. Ghost would come up and comfort us both. He would let us pet him and hug him and kiss him. He licked our faces, and leaned against us.

Master had made a comment last night that I was "making Him look bad". He of course meant it in a joking manner. I was doing my best not to cry. I was attempting to remain strong, for myself, for my Husband, and for Ghost. I told Master that I have my own ways of dealing with things. I remain strong until I absolutely can't any longer. And then the flood gates open and it all comes out.

Today those floodgates started leaking, but I would always pull it short.

I don't know how many times I told Ghost I love him today.

We knew we were doing the right thing for Ghost. His quality of life was on a steady decline and neither of us wanted him to suffer. He deserved better than that. He deserved dignity, love, and understanding. I believe we have done that.

Master drove to the vet. I sat in the back with Ghost. I offered to drive, so Master could sit in the backseat. He said that Ghost was used to Him driving, so that's what He was going to do.

We got to the vet's office and both the vet and the assistant were very kind. I don't want to record all the details. It's not that I can't. It's that I choose not to declare it for all the world to see. It was a moment that only very few were witness to, and I feel it should stay that way. I will say that I was the last thing Ghost saw, and Master's voice was the last thing Ghost heard.

It was so hard leaving the office. We stayed for quite a while. But it was so fucking hard to leave. The floodgates were torn open at this point.

At home, we have been remembering all the goods times we had. All the goofy things he did. All the love the three of us have shared, as only a dog and his father and mother can. I may have come into his life later, but I was his mother. He adopted me as that. I am honored to hold that title. And I am grateful to have known him.

We still cry, heavily. I'm crying as I type this post.

As I was getting out of the shower this evening, I swear I saw his shadow on the shower curtain as I was pulling it back. He always laid half in the hallway, half in the bathroom when I took a shower.

The rational part of my brain knows that he is no longer physically here. He is no longer in pain, he is no longer confused as to what is happening to his body.

But I just miss him so much.

Ghost, I know I've told you millions of times already, but I love you pup. You hold a very special place in my heart that no one else will ever touch. I am grateful to have been a part of your life. I will always miss you, and will never, ever forget you. Thank you for giving me the chance to be a part of your pack, and for accepting me into your heart as well.

March 28, 2010

Tomorrow Is Going To Suck

And it's going to suck hardcore.

Today, shortly after we had gotten up, before Master went to go take His shower, we had a talk. It was about our pup, Ghost. He's not really a pup anymore. He's 11.

This talk was started because Ghost had yet another accident in the apartment. For the past few months it has been more and more frequent. He can't seem to control his bowel movements anymore. We take him out plenty of times during the day. We keep a close eye on him to see if he's acting like he has to go. But the accidents continue to happen, again and again.

So we started talking about Ghost's age and what is best for him. Ghost has had a bad hip for some time now, since the surgery that was done to remove a tumor from his back leg. We've given him supplements to help with health joints and arthritis. They seemed to work for a while, but not much anymore.

He has fat tumors, and is getting another one.

When he has his accidents, or goes outside it's not "normal" at all most times. He is sleeping more and more. In fact for about the past two months he's been sleeping 90% of the day. He's not as active as he use to be.

He's having more problems walking and jumping up onto the couch or bed.

He's starting to separate himself from the rest of the "pack". Ghost is normally a very social animal. But now? Once he's done his rounds to make sure everyone is okay and getting some pets here and there, he goes back to the bedroom and just lays in there. We encourage him to come out and spend time in the living room with us, but after about 15-20 minutes of that, he gets up and excuses himself to the bedroom again. Master and I both know that with canines, with they sense that they are starting to go they will cut themselves off from the pack, for the most part. It's sad as hell, but true.

There are more things going on.

So this talk led to the thought of maybe it is time to let him go. We don't want to put him through a lot of tests or treatments. It wouldn't be fair to him. He wouldn't understand what is going on. As is, when he has problems getting up off the floor or jumping up onto the bed or couch he looks at us like "Why is this happening?" and it breaks our hearts.

I told Master that the decision ultimately lies with Him. Master has had Ghost since Ghost was 10 months old. I came into the picture when Ghost was 4 years old, and didn't start living with him full time until he was around 6 or 7.

So as much as I love Ghost, and consider him to be our dog.. in reality he is and always has been Master's dog. I told Master that I would back His decision 100%.

We both cried and have continued to cry on and off throughout the day. Master told me that we would go to the vet's office tomorrow and talk with them. Originally Master said He would just go, since I am scheduled to work tomorrow. But He also said that if the vet agreed, He would put Ghost down that day because He doesn't want to drag it out. And I want to be there. I don't want Ghost to think I didn't care, or that work was more important.

I have vacation days. I'll be using one tomorrow. I wish they allowed mourning leave in these type of situations. I know Master is going to be a wreck, and I know I will be as well. But I also know that I can't take many days off right now. I'm not trying to say that my job is more important, but the reality is that we need my paycheck. It's a sucky reality, but a reality none the less.

Master told me that He's been tossing this idea around in His head for about two months now. He hadn't said anything because He wanted to be sure first.

So tomorrow, we are going to the vet's office. It's going to tear us apart, but we don't want to be selfish and make Ghost suffer.

March 27, 2010

My Saturday

I woke up at 11am. Master was already awake and reading His book. We chilled for a little while and then headed out to meet up with a guy we have been e-mailing back and forth. This guy wants to surprise his girlfriend with another girl to play with while both men watch. Honestly, Master and I have been looking for something like this for quite some time now.

We got to the restaurant and we sat and talked for a while. Most of the talking was done between Master and the guy. And it was mostly about video games. We briefly touched on the subject of what we had been discussing via e-mail but it was short lived. We were there for about two hours.

I was a bit confused afterward and Master said that He didn't really feel comfortable discussing details like that in a public place. I shrugged and was like, "Uh. Okay." I mean we didn't have to get to the dirty details, it's just that I didn't think most of the talking was going to be about video games. It kind of threw me for a loop I guess. I was somewhat afraid that the guy wasn't interested anymore, after meeting us. Why afraid? Well because we've been looking for a situation like this for a couple years now and usually it's either a guy pretending to be a girl on the internet, the girl is not attractive in my eyes, the girl is a complete and utter bitch, or the girl doesn't want Master around.

I think I mentioned in a previous post about how I'm kind of nervous to play with a girl again. It's been over 10 years now. But I'm sure things will come back to me.

Master and I went to Best Buy after we were done at lunch so I could look at computers. I want to start saving up for new one. I found one I want, and isn't a bad price. So now I have a goal.

Once we got home I e-mailed the guy to see if he was still interested in setting up the surprise for his girl. He said he is and wants to set it up sooner rather than later! So... it looks like this is actually going to happen. Holy hell.

Now we are just relaxing for the rest of the evening. I still have writer's block on my assignment which is due tomorrow. So I'm going to go try and put some more into that shortly.

March 26, 2010

Fridays Are Bittersweet

Fridays are always bittersweet. The weekend is there, almost within your grasp, but first... you have to get through work.

Ah well. Work wasn't bad at all today, it was just slow and boring. Although I was kind of glad for that, because this week has kind of kicked my tail. So the down time was needed, although it didn't help the time pass any quicker.

Once I got home Master and I relaxed for a while. He got two new books in the mail today, my gifts to Him. They are parts 4 and 5 in the Elric saga by Michael Moorecock. Good books, but a little dry for me sometimes. I have to be in a mood for them.

Master and I have kind of gotten tired of our Friday routine of going to our usual restaurant. The service hasn't been as great lately. With some servers, it's almost as if they know we come in often, so why put in the extra effort? We're already repeat customers. That irritates me. If anything, my common sense would dictate that they should be providing better service because we are repeat customers. Ah well.

So instead we went to a different local restaurant. We had a great time. The service was great, the food was delicious and we had fun just sitting there and joking around with one another.

Once we got home we watched another episode of Dexter and then I took my bath and put on one of my new pairs of stockings. I like them, but they aren't my favorite. I had gone away from my fishnet fascination and it is more of a webbing than anything else. It's okay, but not as comfortable. I guess I just feel sexier when I'm wearing fishnets. *shrugs*

Now we are just kind of doing our thing. Master's knee is bothering Him. :-( Poor guy. It's a little swollen, but I know He'll be fine.

March 25, 2010

Um.. WTF?

Work wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be today. My trainer helped me with some of the work, so I was able to get almost everything done, which was awesome and kept me from getting stressed the hell out.

Although I found out why V called in yesterday. The story she gave everyone was that her heart was beating irregularly, but she refused to see a doctor so there for has no doctor's excuse. *raises eyebrow* But later in the afternoon she slipped and told me that she filed her answer to her upcoming divorce.

Okay, so your heart was giving you so much pain and worry that 1) You refused to go to a doctor, and 2) You were still able to go to the court house. Yeah. Right.

So I was pissy with her all day. She has her half day this Friday, she could have waited until Friday afternoon. Dumb bitch.

When I got home from work my lingerie had arrived! Finally. Sort of. I had ordered seven items. There were only four in the package. So I went onto the company's website and looked for a phone number. There wasn't one, so I sent an e-mail instead and am now not so patiently waiting for a reply.

After we ate dinner and watched some Dexter, I took my bath and Master had me put on one of my new sets of stockings. They are fishnet crotchless pantyhose. I love me some fishnet. I don't know why, but I much prefer fishnet over regular pantyhose. Probably because I think they look better and also because I can't put a run in them by simply putting the damn things on. That shit pisses me off.

I came out of the bathroom in my new fishnets and a pair of heels. Master had me stand in front of Him, facing away from Him, as He fondled my ass and complimented me.

In regards to my assignment, which is due on Sunday, I'm kind of at a block right now. I've written out two scenarios I would like to try, and detailed how I think they would go. I tried to be vague and I think I pulled off the whole "no script" thing, while giving enough detail that it wouldn't seem like I was skirting the issue.

I have a little while longer before it's due. It's currently two pages long but I would like to add more to it. I have a feeling I'll be jogging ideas around in my head most of tomorrow. I was attempting to do that today but I was so busy that I could hardly think straight.

Either way I hope Master ends up pleased with the results.

March 24, 2010

Day of Suckage

And not the fun kind! My coworker, we'll call her V just so I can stop referring to her as "my coworker", you know the one who's always slacking off?

Well she has been out of vacation and personal time since January. Her time does not renew again until August. In between January and now she has taken off quite a few afternoons, some how. Now the company I work for isn't exactly strict about going over your time. You get a formal warning that you have gone over your time, and they do say they will fire you over it. But last year before her time renewed she had gone over her time by 40+ hours.

August doesn't sound that far away, until you realize you have to make it that far at a job before your vacation and personal time are renewed.

She took today off. She called in. So I had to do her job, which meant that my work was pushed off to the side. Normally Wednesdays during my non payday week are jam packed with so much work I barely finish my own work before I leave. So yeah, I was not happy that I had to drop all of my work in favor of hers. So when/if she comes into work tomorrow it should prove to be interesting. I'm wondering what her excuse is.

Personally, if I knew I had to wait until August before my time renewed, I wouldn't be calling into work unless I was deathly ill, Master was deathly ill, or someone very close to me passed away. I'm paranoid that way, about the possibility of losing my job because I had the sniffles, ya know?

So I now probably won't be completely caught up on my work until early next week. Yes, one day can throw me off that much. It's insane.

There isn't overtime available so I can't go in on the weekend either. Blah.

Master picked me up and we took AM home. We all discussed how the hell V still has a job, with her attendance record. AM said that maybe my supervisor is looking for a replacement before he fires her. That would be awesome.

March 23, 2010

Assignment & Other Things

Sunday night Master and I had retired to the bedroom for the evening and we were cuddling and what not before we started fucking. While we were talking as we cuddled, because we can multitask ya know, I brought up how our views on role-playing (as in sex) seem to differ. He then gave me an assignment that is due this up coming Sunday, to write out what my thoughts on role-playing (again, as in sex) are and what scenarios I would like, etc and so on. Basically to just lay out my expectations. So I started that last night. I want it to be in-depth but I don't want to seem like I'm babbling in it or creating a script. Why? Because a script sounds boring. If you already know exactly how it's going to go down, why bother?

It's a fine line. Because I know the fantasies in my head, and how those go, but I want to leave it open enough that we could have a lot of fun with it.

It should be interesting to see what ends up on the page as my fingers wander across the keyboard. I'm pretty excited about having an assignment. I made a new folder on the computer for assignments, in case He decides to do more in the future.

Also, Master and I are looking into getting bicycles. I can't just call them bikes because then you might think I'm referring to motorcycles, and yeah. No. We don't have that kind of money.

So I was looking at bicycles online and I stumbled upon Huffy (the kind I use to have) and Mongoose. Master prefers the Mongoose. But looking online is just to get an idea of what we want. To me, you have to go to the store and sit on the damn thing to make sure it's comfortable, other wise you just wasted your money.

I miss having a bicycle. And I also want to get more excercise into my routine and having a bicycle will help with that. I think it'll be a lot of fun for both of us. And since it's getting nicer out, it would be the perfect time to get them.

Although we do live in an apartment, we plan on just parking them in the back bedroom. I refuse to put them in the storage unit in the basement because although we live in a nice area, a lot of the younger kids who live in the apartment complex (say, 12 and under) usually have no adult supervision and like to think they can do whatever the fuck they want. So the back bedroom it is!

First we have to be able to afford them however.

In other news, today marks the one year anniversary at my job! Yay me! The longest I've worked at one company was two years. I'm hoping to last a lot longer than that. I'll get 15 vacation days, 6 personal days, and 9 paid holidays once I reach the five year mark. Sweet. Right now I have 5 vacation days, 6 personal days, and 9 paid holidays. That's pretty awesome as well, but man do those 10 extra vacation days per year sound nice. Four more years to go!

Now all I have to do is sit back and wait for my pay raise... er... I mean review. Yeah. That's totally what I meant. Reviews at this company are usually pretty far behind. I was hitting my 6 month mark by the time I got my 90 day review. So I'm not holding my breath. I figure I'll wait about two to three months and then start asking questions. Hopefully I won't have to bring it up at all, and I'll get a nice e-mail telling me when to show up in HR's office sooner rather than later.

March 22, 2010

Horrible Start To The Week

The weekend must have been too perfect. I had dick for breakfast, lunch, and dinner yesterday and was finally exhausted around 12:30am. I know damn well I set my alarm, although admittedly I did it with a sigh, so that I would get up on time.

Well this morning our house phone started ringing at 7:10am. I'm like what the fuck? Master handed the phone to me and it was MZ, from the carpool, wondering if I was going to work today. I quickly told her I had overslept and that my alarm hadn't gone off and to please, please, please, give me five minutes.

I brushed my teeth, brushed my hair, tossed some clothes on, quickly said goodbye and "I love You!" to Master and ran out the door. I don't care how much of a hurry I'm in, I always say goodbye and "I love You" to Master before I leave for work, even if He's asleep.

I apologized to both MZ and AM once I got into the car and we headed off to work.

We still made it to work on time, thankfully. But still, that's a shitty way to start the week, ya know?

Master called me a little later in the day and said that the cell phone we use as an alarm was turned off when He checked it after I left. It had a full battery when we went to sleep last night. So apparently I woke up when it went off, and turned it off but have no memory of doing such what-so-fucking-ever. I hate when that happens. So Master told me I should start setting both of the old cell phones each night. One on the headboard, and one on the table so that if anything I'll have to get up when the one on the table goes off just to turn the damn thing off which should wake me up enough to realize it is time to get ready for work.

The work day went by rather easily however. Let's hope that's a good sign for the rest of the week.

March 21, 2010

Happy Anniversary

Today Master and I have been together for seven years, and we've been married for three of those years. There is a huge benefit to getting married on your "regular" anniversary. It's so much easier to keep track of everything. ;-)

The phone woke us up around 9:30 this morning. It was my father. He wanted to know if him and his girlfriend could come up and visit for awhile. I had basically told everyone that today would be just myself and my Husband, since it is our anniversary. However, I had not bothered to call my dad because he's normally so busy with work that it's not an issue. So where as I felt bad, because my father hardly ever has a full day off of work, I explained that it is our anniversary, and he said he completely understood. I still felt a little guilty about it though. But I know my father understood, and wasn't upset.

We'll have to visit him sometime soon. I'll probably call him sometime this upcoming week and try to plan something.

Anyway, after I got off the phone Master and I went out into the living room where He gave me a big hug, picking me up off the ground and swinging me from side to side, making me smile, and said "Happy Anniversary hun. I love you."

Shortly after Master's shower He called me over to His chair and had me put lotion on His tattoos. Afterward I knelt at His feet and we talked for a little while, before He called me to Him and had me kneel up and rest my head on His chest while He stroked my hair and back. Apparently when I slid down to rest on my ankles again, my breasts rubbed just right and Master moaned a bit. (He was naked.) I giggled and continued to rub against His cock and then stroked Him for a while before He ordered me to the bedroom.

After He filled me we cuddled for a bit and then Master decided He was hungry. So we took the scenic route down to the restaurant where we had our wedding reception. The food was very good, and Master and I enjoyed ourselves quite a bit.

Once we got home we relaxed, read for a while, and basically just enjoyed the afternoon. Again He took me to the bedroom and allowed me to be on top. I was extremely tired after, but Master told me that I am not allowed to take a nap today. But He did indulge me with extra cuddle time, which was very relaxing.

I took my bath after we had dinner and put on my school girl outfit, like I had been told to do.

I wanted to hop on and do my blog post since it is almost 10:30pm. I have to go to work tomorrow, which saddens me a bit. I don't want this weekend to end. It has been wonderful. Master and I had the whole weekend to ourselves, and it was much needed and very much appreciated.

Seven years. It is the longest relationship I've had. And I know in my heart that this is the last one I will have, which is why a little over five years ago I asked Him to marry me. I love my Husband very much. I hope He has enjoyed this weekend as much as I have.

Three years of marriage doesn't sound like a lot, but in this day and age where divorce is the end result 50% of the time, to me three years marks another milestone. Another step in the right direction. I know we'll have many more to come.

March 20, 2010

Bumming Around

Master and I didn't go to bed until around 2:30am last night. But we had some fun before finally curling up and fell asleep.

We got up and out of bed around noon. At first I didn't think we'd end up having a productive day. But I was wrong. Master took His shower, and once He came back out to the living room He asked me what I wanted to do today. He didn't really have any preferences, for a change. Usually Master has a pretty set idea as to how He wants to spend our days together.

So I suggested that we go to a bookstore, that is a mom and pop shop. Normally we can find books we're looking for there. Unfortunately this time we only found one book, but even still it's one we can't find anywhere else. So at least that much.

After that He had me pick out a restaurant to have lunch at. I chose Applebee's. We hardly ever go there, and I wanted to go somewhere different. It ended up being a really good idea! We had only been to the one in town once or twice. Every other time we've gone to the one in Master's hometown, which is very rarely.

The food was sssoooo good. And the service was exceptional. We had such a good time! It was just that small change to our routine, and it seemed to really brighten up our Saturday, oddly enough.

From there we went to another bookstore, and Master found a book for me! Yay! (Can you tell we're bookworms to a point?)

After that we stopped at a game store and I got Master a game for our anniversary that He's been wanting for a little while. We came home and have been just relaxing since then and enjoying our evening again.

Tomorrow is our anniversary! I hope it goes by slowly, so I can savor it before having to start up another work week that will probably drag. I'm just glad that our anniversary is during the weekend. Normally I have to work on our anniversary and that always sucks. :-( I would much rather have our anniversary off than my birthday.

Well, I'm off. Expect a gushy post tomorrow. ;-)

March 19, 2010

Wonderful Friday

Today has been absolutely wonderful. (Also, why the hell can I never spell absolutely correctly without spell check?)

I got up and went to work. It was my half day, so I got out at noon. I love that. I hope I never have to change jobs because not getting out at noon every other Friday would seriously suck ass.

Master picked me up from work since we had plans to meet up with His father for lunch at 1pm, and the carpool would have made me late for that. We got to the restaurant about a half hour early, but it wasn't a big deal because Master and I just sat there and talked, which was nice.

His father showed up right on time, and Master and I stood up to give him a hug and say hello. This is only my second time meeting my father-in-law. Master and His father had not been talking to one another for quite some time by the time we got together. And it wasn't until about a year ago that they got back in contact. And even then it was somewhat flimsy. I am happy to report that it seems that they are allowing the past to remain in the past and are getting along wonderfully.

I really enjoy spending time with His father. He's a very down to Earth, no bullshit, kind of guy. In fact, the thing I find interesting is that even though Master was not raised by His father and only spend limited amounts of time with him when He was growing up, they are a lot alike, in good ways. They seem to have the same sense of humor, the same ability to tell a story about basically anything and keep you interested in it just by the way that they are telling it, and the fact that they aren't afraid to say exactly what is on their minds.

Also, I'm happy to say that my father-in-law genuinely seems to like me! My mother-in-law says that she likes me, but I think she only likes me in so far as "You married my son, so I'll put up with you." I think she really liked me when she first met me. You know, when I was still trying to make a good impression. I covered up my tattoos, I didn't swear all that often, and I was rather quiet because I was forever biting my tongue. Now? I don't care if my tattoos are showing, I swear when I want to, and I don't bite my tongue as often.

Basically she is finally getting to know the real me. And I don't think it fits into her ideal world. Oh well.

On the other hand, my father-in-law cracks jokes with me, and there isn't an awkward silence when Master leaves to use the bathroom and we're left to our own devices. We have an easy time talking to one another. He told Master that I'm spunky. *giggles*

We ended up sitting and talking for a good two hours before he had to get back home. I had a really great time!

After that Master and I came home and I ended up taking a two hour nap. Once I woke up we went to the game store and Master traded in some of His older games and got a different one. It's always great walking into a store, coming out with something new, and not having to pay anything out of pocket. We ate dinner and watched a movie. Now we're just relaxing and having a good time.

March 18, 2010

Tick Tock

Today went pretty smoothly, surprisingly. Usually Thursdays kick my tail up and down the block. But today, it was a good day. And it was really nice outside when I got out of work. It almost felt like I had gotten out of work early, because the sun was shining and it was warm out. Thankfully I remembered my sunglasses today.

Once I got home from work Master and I had dinner and watched the first disc of season 3 for Dexter. I love that show. We watched the first two episodes on that disc, and will watch the last one after I take my bath tonight.

Tomorrow I get out of work at noon, so we are having lunch with my father-in-law. It'll be my second time meeting him. As a result, Master is picking me up from work rather than having me dropped off by my carpool. It'll just make life easier.

Other than that there isn't a lot going on. My new purse should be here this upcoming Monday. And my lingerie hasn't been shipped yet. :-( I want it!!

March 17, 2010

Wind Up Doll

Last night Master's insomnia was still with Him. But I didn't go to bed alone! ;-) He came to bed with me and claimed me, which was amazing! Several orgasms later, and after being filled with Him cum He laid next to me and kissed the top of my head before ordering me to go to sleep. (I wanted to stay up and have a cigarette with Him but it was almost midnight so He said no, that I had to go to sleep.)

He told me today, that last night He came to bed around 2am. Apparently I was having a bad dream or something because as He was laying in bed trying to fall asleep I was all over the place and ended up kicking Him. He told me to move over and I made some kind of incoherent noise. He told me again, and again I responded with a noise. Then He said, "Get against the wall!" as my side of the bed is pushed up against the wall of the bedroom. He said I responded by quickly moving over towards the wall, saying "Sorry Sir!" and then going back to sleep.

I, of course, have no memory of this. But Master found it amusing. He said it seems my training goes pretty deep if I'm responding that way when I'm asleep. *giggles* I guess it's no different than when I wake up and I'm laying on my back with my legs apart, and my arms above my head crossed at the wrists. That always makes Master chuckle.

When I got up this morning I felt energized, which was pretty surprising since I'm not a morning person at all. And that energy stayed with me most of the day. It wasn't until about 3pm that I started to drag my feet.

And now at 9pm, I'm exhausted. I told Master that I feel like a wind up doll. It's like my key was turned tight since the beginning of the day and finally it has stopped spinning, and my body (let alone my mind) doesn't want to work.

March 16, 2010


Okay so the new purse that I ordered was shipped today. It should be here by this upcoming Monday. Yay!

I had a really hard day at work, and when I got home I told Master about it and before I sat down He pointed to the floor in front of Him, after I had taken off my jacket.

So I set my soda down and knelt in front of Him. He told me, as an anniversary present, that I could go online and order some outfits. He gave me a price ceiling (excluding shipping) and I was so happy! I gave Him a big hug and a kiss.

We ate dinner and I browsed online looking for stuff I wanted. I found some things but basically with the price cap I was given, I was only going to be able to get like two things. That would have sucked. So I looked at different websites and eventually gave up and went and took my bath.

But I hadn't given up for long! Once my bath was done and He told me I could relax I was right back to Google looking for different places. Finally I found a website and I got about seven items and was still under the price cap! Rock on!

It'll take a little while to get here, and it won't be here for our anniversary this Sunday but that's okay.

I know we could have gone to the local porn stores and gotten lingerie there but after a while, since they don't seem to change their stock out very much, Master and I end up going "We already have that, that's almost exactly like the other thing, that's ugly, etc."

Online is the best way to go, in my opinion, when buying lingerie.

I'm trying to convince Master to allow me to pay for our dinner on Sunday. He may or may not. We shall see.

March 15, 2010

Fitful Night

Master and I had incredible sex last night, and I was exhausted afterward. But for some stupid reason I woke up at 4am and continued to doze on and off, waking up fully every so often, until finally my alarm went off. So needless to say I was not awake most of the day. I was sluggish and just kind of there.

Although one thing I remember, with a smile, about last night (besides the sex I mean) is that at one point I woke up and Master and I were facing one another. He was fast asleep and we were holding each others hand while we had been sleeping. Aw! *swoon*

Work dragged. My supervisor is an asshole. But whatever.

Master picked me up today and on the way home we grabbed dinner. While we ate we watched a movie. I fell asleep during it at one point and when I woke up the movie had reached the end and Master wasn't in the living room. I stumbled around the apartment a bit and realized He was in the bathroom, so I hopped online and waited for Him.

Apparently my poor Husband is not feeling well. As soon as He came out of the bathroom He said He was going to go to bed. He didn't sleep well last night either, or the night before. So I think the lack of sleep finally caught up to Him. :-( Poor Daddy.

Even with my nap that I hadn't really planned on taking, I'm very tired. But if I go to bed to early the dog won't go out anywhere near his normal time and the rabbits will probably get cranky if I put them to bed to early. Plus if I get too much sleep I'll be even more groggy tomorrow. Blah.

I hope Master feels better in the morning and that we have more time together in the evening. I feel bad for taking a nap during the movie. One minute I was watching it and the next thing I know I was waking up. I must have been pretty damn tired.

March 14, 2010

Sunday - A Blessing and a Curse

Seriously. Sundays are great because I don't have to go into work and relax, but they also suck because I know I have to work the next day.

That's the problem with weekends. Friday nights I'm tired (as in ready to pass the hell out kind of tired) by like 11:30pm - midnight, so it's not really that far from my normal "bedtime". Then there is Saturday which is wonderful. But then Sunday comes around and you know that you have to try and get yourself back into a routine so your Monday doesn't suck so badly.

But of course, it's 10pm right now and I'm not even remotely tired. Add to that the fact that although the clock will be saying 6:25am when my alarm goes off, my body will be thinking its 5:30am. Joy.

Today I had the apartment to myself for a little while. So I had to find ways to entertain myself. I mainly watched stuff on the internet and read my book. Although I did make a wish list of stuff I wanted from one of the stores I stumbled upon the other day. That was kind of fun, although I know I won't be able to afford them for a while. Although Master says we can buy like a piece at a time... which would be cool.

But we also have to save up some money so I can go to the dentist and get some of these cavities taken care of. Not cheap, at all. And since we don't have dental insurance, it's all out-of-pocket and they want to be paid upfront rather than on a payment plan which fucking blows.

Oh well. One step at a time.

Although I think I'll be looking up some exercises I can do easily at home because I want to get in better shape.

March 13, 2010

I Love Saturdays!

Last night Master and I started to watch a movie. It was somewhat late at night and I had been up since early that morning. Plus whenever I'm on my period (which I am) I get tired. So I ended up passing out on my slave mat.

Master woke me when it was time to go to bed. Although I'm glad that my period came now. Our anniversary is next weekend, and I didn't want to be on the rag during that.

The good news is though that I've been taking Excedrin Menstrual Complete and I haven't been bitchy at all! I'm also not cramping as much and I just feel better all around. I take one in the morning and one in the evening and I've been feeling better because of it.

Master is glad that I found something that is working. I know that my PMS was becoming highly unpleasant for the both of us. Not to mention confusing, since it was never bad before. I'd say it was getting steadily worse for about the past 6 months. So something was needed, and so far this stuff seems to be helping.

Master and I slept in until about 11:30am. That was so nice!

We relaxed in the living room for a while and then headed out to the mall. I wanted a new purse because the one I have is a bit to small now. I am keeping more and more stuff in my purse. Plus, the purse I have now is something my mother-in-law got me. And while it's not bad, I wanted something a bit more my style. I've had the current one for about two years.

So we looked at a few different stores at the mall, but I couldn't find one I really liked. However, we did find a t-shirt that Master liked, so He got that. Figures doesn't it? Go to the mall for me and He finds something He wants? *giggles*

We went out to dinner and came home. I did a bit of searching online and found the purse I wanted! It looks awesome. So I ordered and it and hopefully it'll be here within the next week. Here is what it looks like, although it isn't the website I purchased it from. But now, after browsing some of the site, I have bookmarked it since it seems they have some clothing I wouldn't mind having. I'll probably browse it a bit more later and start a wish list!

We've spent the remainder of the afternoon just enjoying being together. We've played video games, we've watched movies, we've talked... etc.

It's been a great Saturday.

The sucky part is that tonight we have to put the clocks ahead an hour. Boo!

March 12, 2010


After a long and boring day at work, Master picked me up and we went home. I got changed and put my hair up, which I hardly ever do. When I came out Master said I looked very nice. :-)

We then went down to the restaurant where we were meeting His mother and her fiance. (We ended up going to the place she wanted to go. It was easier that way.)

Dinner went rather well. Once we were done eating and had been sitting around talking for a bit she invited us out to their condo to see the puppies. Their dog had two puppies a little over two weeks ago. They are so tiny!

I am totally in love with the black and white one, which I have named Chewie. I spent the entire time we were there holding her. She smelled good, and she was super soft. She made little grunting noises if I stopped petting her. Absolutely adorable!

Master wouldn't hold her because He knows how much I want to take the puppy home with us once she's old enough to be taken away from her mother. And He said that if He held her He wouldn't be able to tell me no.

And we can't afford a second dog. Let alone one which we would have to get fixed, and the first round of shots, etc and so on. Plus we can't have two dogs in our apartment.

I mean our apartment is on the first floor. It's a very nice sized two bedroom. And it could comfortably handle another dog, especially since Chewie is going to be a small dog. But our lease agreement does not allow two dogs.

So while I know all of this, it doesn't stop me from wanting the pup. Don't get me wrong I love Ghost, our dog, very much. But he is and always will be Master's dog. I am second in that dog's heart and I know this. And I completely understand that. Master raised Ghost since he was 10 months old. I came into the picture when Ghost was 4 years old.

I miss having a "first" connection with a dog. I had that with my last dog and it is one of the greatest things on this planet. One day we'll be able to have two dogs. Although knowing my luck the second dog will connect more with Master as well. *laughs*

March 11, 2010

Almost There...

It's almost the weekend. It's oh so close! But first I have to make it through another day at work, and dinner with my mother-in-law. Then it's the weekend.

There isn't really a lot going on. We are e-mailing a couple back and forth right now who are interested in possibly getting together for some girl-on-girl while the men watch.

It's been a very long time since I've done anything besides hug a chick. Trust me there have been times where I've been tempted to do more, ya know, like when I'm tipsy and having to remind myself that yes it has been a while but I am not actually attracted to the female in front of me. I do believe I was about... 17 the last time I kissed a girl. And about 16 the last time I did more than that. So... about 10 years.

One part of me is very excited that it might happen again. But another part of me is nervous that I won't know what the fuck I'm doing and make a fool of myself. *laughs*

Plus this girl isn't into pain, which kind of sucks. I mean I'm not a sadist, but I do like to nip, bite, and basically just be a bit aggressive. But if she doesn't like pain she probably won't like the biting or nipping parts. We shall see. That's even if this happens. We haven't met them in person yet.

It seems like whenever it becomes a possibility that I'll get to play with a woman they change their minds, or it never goes past the e-mail stage which is basically when I start thinking that it's a guy typing and sending me pictures from website galleries or of their ex-girlfriends.

Or the other thing that happens is that I am not attracted to the female at all. I don't think I'm a shallow person, but quite honestly if I'm not attracted to you in any way shape or form, it's not going to be fun for anyone involved.

Sometimes I think I need a woman who will be my booty call and let Master watch. *giggles* But trying to find one who doesn't also want to be my girlfriend is a pain in the ass. Hell, just finding one period... who am I kidding.

Although I have talked to some women who said they'd be fine with Master watching but that they'd want alone time too. Or they tell me flat out that they are looking for a girlfriend. It's always funny to me when they tell me to leave my Husband for them.

Yeah let me just leave my Husband, who I've known and loved for 7 years and jump into a relationship with someone I haven't even met in person. That totally makes sense. What the fuck.


March 10, 2010

I Need A Vacation

It's not that life is unbearable at the moment, because it's not. Work is a little stressful, but that's not really unusual.

I don't know if part of this is stress from all of the family stuff that's been going on for the past two months, but I feel worn out today. Not physically, but mentally.

Work wasn't any more draining than usual. The evening with Master has been wonderful. I just took a nice relaxing bath while reading a book that is really catching my attention.

And yet, I feel like I need a vacation.

I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that our anniversary is coming up soon. We're coming up on 7 years together, 3 of which we've been married.

By the way did you know that the "traditional" gift for the third year of marriage is leather?! How much does that rock? The "modern" gift for the third year of marriage is crystal. But we got each other tattoos instead, in January when we had the money for them. Not that I'm complaining at all mind you! Our tattoos will last a hell of a lot longer than leather or crystal. I just find that sort of thing interesting.

Whenever our anniversary comes up, I think back to our honeymoon which was at Sybaris. And guess who just sent me coupons via e-mail? Yeah. Sybaris. They are tempting me! *shakes fist*

And Sybaris was so... perfect. There is no other way to describe our three days and nights there. Absolute perfection. I want to go back so badly! And I know Master does as well. We didn't have to deal with the day to day stuff, which was nice. I mean we missed our animals of course, but we knew they were well taken care of by our friend BC.

We were in our own little world, and it would be great to escape away to that once more. I'm hoping next year, for our anniversary we'll be able to go. Maybe not exactly on our anniversary, but around it. Plus that will be our 4th wedding anniversary, and we got married when we were together for four years, so that would be ideal.

March 9, 2010

Black Hole

Today it felt like I was in some other dimension. When I left for work the fog was extremely thick. It took us a bit longer to get to work than any of us had anticipated, but thankfully we weren't late.

But thanks to the fog, the entire day just seemed gray. The sky was gray, the snow is melting rather quickly, and everyone just seemed really blah. And as such the day went by really, really slowly. I was cranking out work left and right, but that didn't seem to help time speed up. In fact it felt like it was going slower. You know how when you're doing a lot and then you glance at the clock figuring it must have been say, at least 30 minutes and it's only been 10? Yeah. That.

But as soon as I got out of work time sped back up again. Although the cool thing on my way home was that one of the radio stations I was listening to had the theme song from "Lost Boys" (the vampire movie) on. That was pretty awesome, because I love that movie.

Once I got home Master and I ate dinner. He continued to play His video game and I watched RuPaul's Drag Race. I love RuPaul. I would love to meet her and hang out with her sometime. I used to watch her talk show when I was a kid. So when I started watching Season 1 of Drag Race, I was hooked. And I'm so glad that Season 2 is on now.

I started reading one of the books Master and I picked up the other night. It's called "Firefly" by Pierce Anthony. I've never read it before, and I'm only about 23 pages into it. But it seems really good! Master has read it before, and thought I would like it. So far He's right, of course. ;-)

Now to enjoy the rest of the evening with my Hubby.

Also, regarding the dinner on Friday, I'm still not sure if I want to deal with my mother-in-law's bitching. Master said it's entirely up to me as to whether or not I want to bring it up. We shall see. Either way I know I'll enjoy the food at least.

March 8, 2010

Not Exciting...

.. so if you're looking for excitement you might as well skip my post for tonight. Seriously.

And I'm not complaining about the lack of excitement. In fact lately, I'm grateful for the days where Master and I just do whatever we want and not have to worry about anything.

Today was very, very busy.

I got into work and my coworker left for an hour and a half to run errands. *raised eyebrow* Monday mornings are busy as hell where I work. Like non-stop you don't have time to go pee or get a cup of coffee busy. So yeah. That was fun for the first hour and a half of work.

But after she got back I was able to focus on just my work, which was awesome because I got caught up on 99% of my back log (which honestly wasn't that much to begin with but it was still worrying me).

So it was with a sigh of relief when I walked out the door and we were heading towards downtown so Master could take me the rest of the way home. We dropped off AM and then went home.

The evening has been spent eating dinner, watching a really interesting movie called "Control" and me taking a nice long shower. Although it seems the hot water was mostly used up by the time I got around to taking it. Oh well, it was warm enough to relax my shoulders, so I can't really complain there.

This Friday we are going out to dinner with my mother-in-law to celebrate my birthday (which was last Thursday). She picked the restaurant. It's an Italian restaurant. We've been to this place before and it has great pizza and the garlic bread is yummy. But it's not the most comfortable place to eat. The last time we went we were sat at a table where Master and I couldn't really breathe because I was smashed up against a wall and another chair and He was smashed up between another chair and the path where the waiters walked.

They don't have booths! Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?! I want a booth damnit, not a table. Master and I hate sitting at tables in restaurants. It just feels to open and like no matter how you try to get comfortable you're going to knock into someone or something.

So Master and I have been toying around with the idea of asking His mom if we could go to a different Italian restaurant, which is pretty close to the one she wants to go to. Now on the one hand I could pull the, "But it's my birthday celebration!" and see how that goes. But the place Master and I want to go to (where in my opinion the food is better, and the atmosphere is much more relaxed) isn't as.... "ritzy". I don't know how else to put it. "Ritzy" isn't really our thing, at all. We prefer a relaxed atmosphere and some place where we feel like we can just have a good time and be ourselves.

And when I mentioned this place to her in the past she turns her nose up at it.

This particular place we want to go to is where Master and I had our first date. So on one hand it'd be great to go where we want to go, for a change, but on the other hand we don't want her making snide little comments and ruining the evening. Decisions, decisions, decisions.

What would you do?

March 7, 2010

No Title

Today Master and I slept in until about 12:30pm. That probably has a lot to do with the fact that we didn't go to bed until almost 3:30am. So getting to sleep tonight probably won't be the easiest thing in the world, but that's usually how it is. It's always hard to get up on a Monday morning anyway, no matter the circumstances.

We both had been wanting some books, so late in the afternoon we went out to Barnes and Noble. Unfortunately, they didn't have anything we wanted. Odd isn't it? You go to a huge store that sells basically nothing but what you're looking for, and you still can't find anything. So we went to another book store and He found a book that He hadn't read yet and He showed me two books that He thought I would enjoy since I was having trouble finding anything I wanted on my own.

So we purchased those and went out to dinner, where I finally used the gift card I got for my birthday from my job.

Not a lot to say other than that tonight. So I think I'll end it here.

March 6, 2010

Ah... The Weekend

Yesterday after I got out of work, I dropped off AM since I was the one driving for the carpool that day and MZ had left work early, so I didn't have to drop her off. From there I dropped off our rent check. I really hate cutting it so close to the final due date (which for us is the 5th of each month) but that's how my paycheck landed this time. The important thing is, is that it was on time.

Then I came home and got on the phone with Xbox Customer Support. Yeah. That was fun. Long story short we were supposed to get a plug and play charge kit in the mail from them as of Wednesday, due to a problem we had earlier with them. Okay well we finally got a package yesterday, and guess what... it was a video game that you can pick up at a Game Stop for $10, that neither of us are going to play. The fuck!?

So after an hour and a half and being "disconnected" twice, someone finally told me that they were escalating our issue to Microsoft itself, and that they would be calling us within 72 hours. Now, I'm assuming this is business hours, meaning we probably won't hear anything until Tuesday or Wednesday. Joy.

Then I called our electric company, and had them apply a running credit to this month's bill instead of my sending them a payment. That was a nice quick five minute call.

I then had to call my mother-in-law. We are seeing her next Friday for dinner.

We sat around until about 6:30pm at which time we met up with SS for dinner. After dinner we came back home and watched movies until she went home around 11:30pm. Master wasn't tired at all and wanted to keeping rocking out on His game. I was tired and had a headache, so I fell asleep on the couch until Master apparently took me to bed. I don't remember waking up or getting to the bedroom at all, but apparently I did because that's where I woke up this morning.

Master and I relaxed at home all day. In fact we didn't leave the apartment at all today, which is kind of odd for us. Usually one of us will at least run out to get something we need, like cigarettes or soda or something.

We fucked, which was great! And that's been our day. We played video games, we watched movies, and that's about it. I've enjoyed it.

Oh yeah and I'm still trying to figure out what to buy with the gift card that my job gave me for my birthday. I don't really want to use it for like day to day stuff. But I also don't know what to buy. *sigh*

March 4, 2010

My Birthday

First, let's answer some questions shall we?

What kind of slave mat do you have and where did you get it?
Well when Master first talked about getting me a slave mat, we honestly thought about just buying a large dog bed. But that idea soon went out the window because we figured Ghost (our dog) would just figure it was his. *giggles* There were also thoughts about buying this. But it was to expensive for something that's just going to sit on the floor, and we figured it would take up to much space. Although after looking for that first link I stumbled upon this, which basically looks like a giant bean bag chair. And I kinda want it now. *laughs*

So basically to save money, and so we could easily put it away, we got a bit creative. We purchased a queen size comforter and I folder it over twice to give it some extra padding. I then put a fitted sheet over it, to basically protect the comforter from dirt and what not since it is after all on the floor. I then took two of those pillows with armrests and tossed those on it. Ta-da! Instant slave mat. So basically to answer your question about where I got it, I got most of it at K-Mart.

When did you know that your Master was the One?
I knew Master was the one that I wanted to marry and be with forever and ever around the year and a half mark of our relationship, although I didn't propose marriage until about the two year mark. I knew that I loved Him about three months into the relationship. When did I know that I wanted Him to be my Master? That was pretty quick. I would say we started dabbling with that thought shortly after we started dating and it has grown from there.

How did I know that I wanted Him to be my Master? Honestly, I can't really explain that as I had never "served" anyone else before. I had never been in an M/s relationship prior to Master. All I knew was that I trusted Him, and that we both had an interest in such. The rest, as they say, is history.

How did I know that I wanted to marry Him? Well, I never thought marriage was that big of a deal before I met Him. Granted I was "only" 20 at the time we met, but I saw my parents marriage and how much that sucked, and so basically since I was old enough to have such thoughts, I basically shrugged at the thought of marriage.

But as our relationship grew and evolved I found myself thinking about marriage more and more. I knew I didn't want to spend another day without Him. I knew that I love Him very much, and that He was the only one I could trust completely. I hope that answered your question. :-)


Today is my 27th birthday. I woke up and started getting ready for work when my mother called at 7am on my cell phone to sing happy birthday to me. :-) She said I was lucky she didn't call at 2am since that was when I was born. She threatens that every year, and I just keep telling her she better not. *laughs*

I kissed Master goodbye as He slept right before I left. Once I got to work my brother sent me a text saying happy birthday. My dad called me, and I was honestly surprised by that. I love my dad but oh man is he horrible at remembering birthdays and what not. This is the first time in I'd say about four years that he remembered on the correct date, rather than three or four days later.

My coworkers had decorated my desk with balloons and a happy birthday banner, and also gave me a card signed by everyone in the department. My supervisor stopped by to wish me a happy birthday and give me a birthday card from the company with a $25 visa gift card in it! It was a very pleasant surprise.

The second in command of the company sent me an e-mail. It had no subject line and simply read "Please see attachment". Honestly my heart went into my throat. She never e-mails anyone unless it's very important, or very bad news. So I opened the attachment and it was an animated GIF that said happy birthday and had stars bursting all around it. I made sure to send an e-mail back thanking her.

Then, the biggest shocker of the day, was when the owner of the company came out of his office, walked right up to my desk and said, "Happy birthday (insert my real name here)!" I grinned from ear to ear and said "Thank you so much!" He smiled and nodded his head, then said, "No thank you!" and walked away.

Needless to say I felt very appreciated at my job today. My one year anniversary at the company is at the end of this month. And I have to say no job I've ever had has ever done anything like that for my birthday. I mean most companies couldn't care less. But all of that just from the company! I was flying high on it.

Master was so sweet today. He called me while I was at work to wish me a happy birthday, and when I got home He played a music video of Weird Al's "Happy Birthday To You!". He knew I would appreciate it and love the hell out of it.

He let me pick what movie we watched while we ate dinner. I chose Osmosis Jones. And then once my food had digested He gave me an extra long back rub. *purrs*

Plus most of our friends have either called or texted happy birthday wishes to me through out the day.

It's been an absolutley wonderful birthday. Turning 27 wasn't so bad after all. ;-)

Honestly turning 27 doesn't bother me. Yes, I'm one year closer to being 30 but honestly? I don't care. I'm happy, healthy, and very much in love. What more could I ask for? (Besides a winning lottery ticket I mean.)

March 3, 2010

Fire Alarm Test

Today is my last day as a 26 year old. Yay for me!

Work today wasn't to bad, however they decided to test the fire alarm system. It was loud as hell, and they didn't tell us exactly when it would happening so when it went off it startled me and my heart was racing for a good five minutes after the fact. Plus even after the actual alarm was tested, the strobe-like lights that are part of the alarm system continued to go off for 15 minutes. That sucked. There I am trying to type and all these lights are flashing. So I ended up with a nice little headache from that.

Master picked me up and took me home. About a half hour later our friend BC showed up. It was great catching up with him. He's talking about the possibility of marriage with his girlfriend, so that's wonderful news. Although it would be a long way off since they both have a lot of shit they need to take care of first. But still, I'm happy for him.

He even brought me cupcakes since my birthday is tomorrow. :-) They are delicious.

So we spent a lot of time catching up and just having a good time. He left around 10pm. He wants us to go out on a double date with him and his girlfriend sometime soon. That would be fun, and hopefully we can do it sooner rather than later.

The last time we did it was quite some time ago.

But now I am off to go take my bath since it's almost 10:30pm already.

No new questions yet. But feel free to ask away.

March 2, 2010

First Question

Have you ever been whipped or flogged ? Would it ever interest you?

I have been flogged by Master, but I have never been whipped. Well not with an actual whip anyway. The most Master has used is a flogger, His hand of course, and a flogger. Floggers are okay, although I honestly prefer His hand.

Whips kind of scare the hell out of me. I mean I love the cracking sound they make and when used in a weapon demonstration, they can be quite beautiful when they move. But to have it crack against my skin? Yeah. Scary.

If it were to happen, I would want to know that there was quite a bit of experience in using a whip. Whips can do a lot of damage if they are not used properly. Hell, they can cause a lot of damage if they are used properly.


And now on to the rest of the post. Yesterday at work it was like I didn't have time to breathe I was so damn busy. But today? I was bored out of my mind. It seems that most of the time there is no happy medium. Either I have way to much work to do or there is not enough. Today there was not enough, so the day dragged ass.

But around 4pm I started cheering up a bit because I knew that I only had about 45 minutes before I got out of work and would be on my way home.

AM is getting married at the end of this year, so he was telling us all about the plans they have and what plans still have to be made, etc and so on.. on the ride home.

It sounds like it is going to be expensive. I'm glad Master and I did it the way we did, other wise we'd still be paying off the wedding bills and we're coming up on 3 years of marriage towards the end of this month.

Once I got home Master and I had dinner and watched a movie. Tomorrow BC is coming over after work. I normally don't like having company during the work week, just because it cuts into the time I get alone with Master and also because I can't fully relax. But we haven't seen him since November because he's always so busy with his girlfriend and doing volunteer work.

Last night I had slept on the couch until Master was ready to go to bed. I'm taking to that more and more when He's not ready to go to sleep. It just makes me feel better. Although when He did wake me up to tell me it was time to go to the bedroom it felt like I woke up some what violently. I could be wrong, as I don't really remember, but that's the impression I have in my head. And I remember having bad dreams last night, although I honestly couldn't tell you what they were about.


March 1, 2010

Question & Answer Time

It's officially March which means it's time for Question and Answer month. If you would like to ask me a question, please post a comment or contact me through the Contact Me page, which will send me an e-mail.

As always, Master has final say as to if I am allowed to answer a question. No asking for my real name, my address, phone number or any of that kind of stuff. Common sense here people.

So we're off! Ask away. I will try to answer every question that is allowed as soon as possible. :-)

Mmmm.... Sex....

I could babble on about how sucky my work day was, or complain about stress. But I don't want to. I want to talk about sex. Specifically the sex Master and I had last night.

I had put on some lingerie that I hadn't worn in a while, and Master seemed happy about my choice in attire. When we retired to the bedroom, neither of us were tired even though we both knew I had to get up early in the morning. We laid next to one another cuddling and talking for a little while before my hand finally snaked it's way down to His cock and started stroking Him.

When He went to dip His hand in between my legs He commented on how wet I already was. I giggled a bit and He asked if I just wanted to be fucked, to which I said yes!

So He pinned me down and entered me very slowly. Normally when we have sex it's pretty rough. We don't normally do the slow and more romantic love making. But I was tender and Master decided to go slow for a while. He laid fully on top of me and allowed me to bury my face in His chest and neck while He brought me to orgasm several times.

I then asked if I could ride Him. It had been a while since I had been on top. So He got comfortable and thanks to the previous orgasms His cock slipped back inside of me in no time.

I alternated between going slow and just kind of grinding against Him, and then bucking like a mad woman. When I felt a very intense orgasm building inside me I started to be for His cum, and was granted it, making my orgasm last longer.

I collapsed on top of Him and was exhausted. But we were both out of breath and our mouths were dry, so I fetched a glass of water for us to share. When I got back to the bedroom I cleaned Him off and immediatley noticed His cock hadn't softened much at all after His orgasm.

When I laid down on my side, as I was told to do, I backed my ass against His cock and Master chuckled. I was exhausted, but greatly enjoyed the feeling of His hard dick being pressed against me. Master reached in between us and pushed His cock inside of me and told me to hold it for Him. ;-)

We laid like that for a while. It was a very interesting feeling, His cock being inside me, throbbing, but with no movement. I enjoyed it quite a bit. But eventually Master couldn't take it anymore and started pumping His hips before turning me fully onto my stomach, forcing my legs wide apart by hooking His under mine, pinning me down and using me for His pleasure. It was fast, hard, and very intense.

Once He had filled me with His cum once more I was ready to pass out. Master laid down next to me, we curled up to one another and as soon as my eyes were closed I was asleep.

It was a wonderful way to end the weekend.