March 11, 2010

Almost There...

It's almost the weekend. It's oh so close! But first I have to make it through another day at work, and dinner with my mother-in-law. Then it's the weekend.

There isn't really a lot going on. We are e-mailing a couple back and forth right now who are interested in possibly getting together for some girl-on-girl while the men watch.

It's been a very long time since I've done anything besides hug a chick. Trust me there have been times where I've been tempted to do more, ya know, like when I'm tipsy and having to remind myself that yes it has been a while but I am not actually attracted to the female in front of me. I do believe I was about... 17 the last time I kissed a girl. And about 16 the last time I did more than that. So... about 10 years.

One part of me is very excited that it might happen again. But another part of me is nervous that I won't know what the fuck I'm doing and make a fool of myself. *laughs*

Plus this girl isn't into pain, which kind of sucks. I mean I'm not a sadist, but I do like to nip, bite, and basically just be a bit aggressive. But if she doesn't like pain she probably won't like the biting or nipping parts. We shall see. That's even if this happens. We haven't met them in person yet.

It seems like whenever it becomes a possibility that I'll get to play with a woman they change their minds, or it never goes past the e-mail stage which is basically when I start thinking that it's a guy typing and sending me pictures from website galleries or of their ex-girlfriends.

Or the other thing that happens is that I am not attracted to the female at all. I don't think I'm a shallow person, but quite honestly if I'm not attracted to you in any way shape or form, it's not going to be fun for anyone involved.

Sometimes I think I need a woman who will be my booty call and let Master watch. *giggles* But trying to find one who doesn't also want to be my girlfriend is a pain in the ass. Hell, just finding one period... who am I kidding.

Although I have talked to some women who said they'd be fine with Master watching but that they'd want alone time too. Or they tell me flat out that they are looking for a girlfriend. It's always funny to me when they tell me to leave my Husband for them.

Yeah let me just leave my Husband, who I've known and loved for 7 years and jump into a relationship with someone I haven't even met in person. That totally makes sense. What the fuck.

*sigh*

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