Less Doesn't Equal More

You know that saying I'm sure. "Less is more." And sometimes it's true. However, when it comes to sex (at least in my case) that's just not true.

I was checking my e-mail on Yahoo and they had some article being displayed on their front page a while back dealing with relationship advice. I have no idea why the hell I clicked on it. I think it said something about sex or sex lives. So of course, since I'm twisted, I had to read it.

And I remember sitting there reading it and going... "What. The. Fuck." *nods*

Basically the gist of what a lot of the couples were saying was not to have sex to often. *insert confused look here* I remember one thing rather well that was said in the article. It's not a direct quote but it's pretty damn close. "Chocolate cake is great, but after five days of chocolate cake you just don't want it anymore."

Sex is not chocolate cake. You're right. After five days of eating chocolate cake I wouldn't want to see chocolate cake for a very long time. Dear Gods the tummy aches! However sex... is not something I get tired of. Five days of sex and then... *gasp* more sex?! Hell the fuck yes!

The article was basically implying that after a while sex just gets boring and then it becomes mechanical and you feel like you have to do it even if you don't actually want to. Well no shit. Break away from the same old stuff and maybe then it won't be boring. Sluts against the missionary position unite! Wait. I actually like the missionary position, but um... with twists. ;-)

Master and I have been having sex for damn near six years, and you know what? Never boring. Not once. I have never once laid there going, "Dear Gods is this over yet?" And when our schedules are a bit more "normal" than what they are now.. it is about four to five times a week if not more, especially when the weekends roll around and we have a day off together that is actually spent alone.

Remember a little while back I was some what freaking out because I didn't know what the hell was going on when my sex drive? It is insanely high normally and all of a sudden I was on a down slope. Well, I think it had to do with the fact that it just wasn't happening that often. Like I said our norm was about four to five times a week. And then out of fucking no where it was down to once a week. You would think that that would cause my sex drive to just go through the roof right? I mean.. no release means it builds up. At least that would be the logical thought process. But mine was shutting itself down.

And I think I know why. I think it was doing that almost like a self defense mechanism. I only say self defense because I can't think of a better way to word it.

Here's me. High sex drive.

Now, small amounts of sex.

Then my body starts revving itself up for "next time" but next time doesn't happen for about a week. So my sex drive, instead of going into hyper drive starts to shut down so I don't go out of my damn mind and also so I don't make Master feel guilty. At least that's the way my mind is processing it. I'm not trying to say He should feel guilty or anything along those lines. We were only having sex once a week because of work schedules and one and/or both of us not feeling well. There was nothing either of us could do about it. Another reason why I think it went down a few notches, is so I wouldn't go back to my old ways. "Oh You're to tired for sex?" or "Oh, we don't have time for sex?" used to equal "I must not be attractive right now." or "He doesn't want me."

Blah. Depressing, self defeating crap. I'm sure I've mentioned it before. I used to battle depression before I met Master. I still do in ways, but it is more "old wiring" rather than actual depression, if that makes any sense. The thoughts still bubble up to the surface every now and again but I can smack myself out of it very quickly rather than believing it and fueling said thought processes. Plus Master actually has me talk about such things, rather than me bottling them up and letting them spin and fester inside my grey matter. Something anti-depressants never did for me. Instead they basically made me into a zombie locked inside my own brain with said festering thoughts.

Okay I'm getting slightly off topic here.

So back to my original point. My sex drive. It's baaaccckk!

Let's see. Friday I gave Master a rather quick and aggressive blowjob. Then later that night He fucked me and allowed to me cum many times. Saturday morning He woke me up with sex. And then of course there was last night which was absolutely incredible. His lip has finally healed, and so He could finally kiss and use His mouth in all of the delicious ways that I love. And when we were done and He had me cleaning Him off with my mouth I peaked over His hip and saw how late it was and had to remind myself that I had to get up early in the morning. Other wise I would have continued sucking to try and get Him hard again.

So more sex equals a higher sex drive. The more Master gives it to me, the more I want it. And of course He's also been more strict with me which is making me wetter than usual. The more submissive I feel the hornier I get. It's just how I work I guess. And of course now it is Monday night and Master is at work and I'm fucking horny. *sigh*

But perhaps there is a way to keep that feeling, rather than allowing it to go back down to the lower levels that really makes me feel awkward. While the schedules have been crazy and we haven't been seeing much of one another, I've allowed myself to do the whole pity poor me thing. Ick. But tonight I'm more upbeat. I know that this week is pretty much screwed schedule wise, but I'm focusing on my Husband. I'm thinking of how much I love Him. What His cock feels like inside of me. What His hand feels like on my throat. That pain I get deep inside after being bounced off of His dick like a rag doll. What it feels like when He touches every inch of me, sometimes gently and lovingly. Sometimes roughly and lust filled.

Yes. I think that will help greatly.

** My Dear Kitten page has a new entry for those who are interested.