Memories

You know how I said I had my mother's old computer tower, before we threw it out? Yeah? Well guess what I found on it.

Pictures from our wedding. Yeah. At our wedding reception we didn't have a professional photographer. We asked everyone who had a digital camera to bring it and take pictures, and then send them to us later. Well my mother-in-law has a very expensive camera, and had brought it. She emailed me about 15 pictures from our reception, but I could have sworn she took more. So I figured that they were just blurry, or to dark, or something.

So now, three years later, I found more. Lots more. Ones that were very nice, and that we had absolutely no copies of. So I put them on my flash drive before Master tossed the computer out. I'm glad I looked before we tossed her comp out.

I have now copied them to our computer.

I felt like taking a walk down memory lane, and flipped through them, including the ones that we already had. Gods the emotion that is able to flow through a picture and straight into you is just... amazing.

We look so happy, and so very much in love. We look like we're having the times of our lives at our $500 reception with no professional photographer, no DJ, no decorations. Just us, our friends and family, a boom box, food, and a simple wedding cake.

So many people seem shocked that we didn't have any of the typical stuff at our reception. But I can't imagine doing it any other way.

Looking at those pictures I can close my eyes, and can remember everything as if it had just happened a month ago.

Sometimes, when finances are so tight I can barely breathe, and we're both stressed out beyond belief, I look through our reception and honeymoon pictures. We were broke as hell, after paying for the wedding rings, reception, and honeymoon. We were basically on our last penny. But we were so happy. No stress was touching us. And I remind myself that we were so much worse off back then. Neither of us were working at the time. And look how happy we were.

I'm not saying we're not happy now. I'm still very much in love with Him. I can't imagine my life without Him. I really can't. Yes, we piss each other off, and yes we get into arguments. But sometimes I just need to look at those photos and remind myself not to sweat the small stuff. That as long as we have each other, we'll find a way through absolutely anything. Just like He said we would in a poem He wrote me back before we were engaged. A poem I still have, and read from time to time.

This upcoming March, we'll have been together for 8 years and married for 4 years. The upcoming anniversary is the one where I wanted to rent the same reception hall again and have an anniversary party. Why? Because we were married on our 4 year anniversary. So it seems only fitting to have an anniversary party on our 4 year wedding anniversary.

I don't think we'll have the money for it. I'm sure the prices have gone up. But that's not whats important anyway. What's important is that we're still together, and still very in love.

One of these years we'll have an anniversary party. I would hold a small one here at our apartment, but most people don't want to drive up to where we are. My family lives 45 minutes away and His mother is a half hour away. So all that would probably show up would be BC and HG. Not that that would suck or anything, but it would be disappointing to me on some level, and I know that.

So I think we'll save the big celebration for another year. Yeah I know, our anniversary is somewhere around 7 months away. But it is a big deal to me, and it's something I look forward to every year, very much. Another chapter in our lives closed, another year gone, and a new one beginning, with many more on the horizon. And to me, the next one is a big one.

It's not the traditional 5 year, or 10 year mark. But it's a big one to me, because of the emotional and spiritual ties to the number four.

I believe I have to work that day actually, which really really sucks. In fact it's a Monday. So yeah, I do have to work. That blows. Maybe I'll still have enough personal time to take that day off. Who knows. It's a ways off.