Hhhmm..

Today we went down to my mother's for a little while. I have been spacey all damn day because I took a Benadryl. Non-drowsy my tail. After we went to my mother's we had an early dinner and then went to a store to get rabbit food.

When we got home I ended up falling asleep on my slave mat. I couldn't really wake up very easily. Master would tell me to get up and it was like I was in a haze. So Master suggested that I go take my bath and put on one of my new outfits. While I did that I asked Him to make me some coffee so I could wake up a bit more.

So here I am, clean, in a new outfit, drinking coffee at 9pm.

I like this new outfit. But it made me realize how much I do not like my stomach. I have put on about 10 - 15 lbs in the past year or so, and I don't like it. Master says I look great. That He loves the way I look. But I personally feel that I could stand to lose about... you guessed it... 10 - 15 lbs. It's a small weight loss goal.

But I know that as a body ages, it seems to be harder to get rid of unwanted weight gain. So I figure I'm 26 now, turning 27 in March, I might as well try to get rid of it now, and keep it off. Rather than letting it go and ending up with more weight gain and a lower self-esteem.

For those of you who are wondering.. I'm 5ft1 and around 120 lbs right now. No, that isn't a typo. And please no comments of "Pffftt... 120 lbs. Shut up little girl."

This is about my own self image, which is somewhat fragile at times. I need to stop eating so much junk. I think when we go grocery shopping I'll ask Master if I can buy some healthier snacks for when I'm at work. This will not only help with weight loss, but will also help me feel better all around. Or at least I'm hoping it does.

Now I just have to figure out what kind of healthy snacks would be easy to have at work. Research here I come.

Instead of a bag of chips.. maybe some Sun Chips, which taste really good and are good for you. I'll just have to keep a closer eye on things. I don't want to "let myself go". I want to remain attractive to Master. I know He still finds me attractive. I weighed about as much as I do now when we first met, if not a little bit more.

But I also want to continue feeling good about myself. I would like to get a small exercise routine going as well. That is more for health issues and for helping my fibromyalgia as well. Stretching and things of that nature help control fibromyalgia flair ups. Or at least they do in my case.

So I am going to ask Master to help me with this goal of mine, by helping me eat less healthy foods. Or at least not such big portions of it. And having me keep up on such things.