Love Is..

Love it seems, means different things to different people. Before I continue with this post, I want to clarify that I am doing this post based on my own thoughts and feelings as well as what I have observed in other people's relationships. People that I know, or have known.

I used to think that I knew what love was. I used to think that it was something that meant you had to put up with a lot of shit to maybe feel happy every now and then. It was something that you had to suffer through. These thoughts, of course, were what I thought love was before I met Master.

Of course I met Master at the ripe old age of 20. So yeah, I didn't know what the hell it was. I put up with assholes and their emotional and physical abuse and thought that the good days were what made up for it.

That isn't what I believe love to be anymore.

Now I believe that love is something that you feel at all times, even when you may not be in the best of moods. It is something that you know to be real, something you don't have to question.

I also believe you can love someone very deeply, even if they are not your favorite person at the moment. *giggles* Let's face it. You aren't always perfectly happy with the one you love. Sometimes arguments happen, sometimes fights happen (verbal, not physical). Sometimes you get mad at them and need time to cool down. Hence, they are not your favorite person right then. But you still love them. You don't think about leaving or walking out that door, as in permanently, just because you are pissed off.

Love is something that surrounds you. It touches your mind, your body, and your soul. It strikes you at the core. It can be wonderful, it can be painful, and it can be scary. It is a roller coaster of all those things, depending on what situation you are in at the given time.

It can be wonderful, when you are curled up in that person's arms and just enjoying their scent and their touch.

It can be painful, when you know that they are upset with you.

It can be scary when they are ill or are injured.

But other people I know seem to think that love is something that can be used to manipulate and to control the other person. And I don't mean in a kinky way either. I mean as in a malicious way. This pisses me off, to see others use that emotion in order to get what they want. You shouldn't have to do that if you truly want someone to be with you. You shouldn't have to twist their emotions into a confused pretzel.

I don't know what has triggered this post. But for some reason I just want to get it out there, even if it doesn't make a lot of sense.

Love also gives another person a lot of.... power, for lack of a better word. They can use it to raise you up, or to bring you low. They can say words that will have you soaring high enough that the birds are envious. And they can say words that make you want to crawl into the darkest hole you can possibly find and cry, without even meaning to.

Love is a two sided blade in that way. But you can't have the sweet without the possibility of the sour.

Master and I have had our times where we have hurt one another without meaning to. It's not like in my past relationships where the verbal barbs were done on purpose, to win a fight or to piss the other person off.

And Master and I have had our times where we have been able to touch the sky because we were so happy. I have never felt that before. That is unique to me.

The high times, have been far more numerous.

I'm rambling. But I'm glad I wrote this, for some strange reason.