August 16, 2009

What We Are Is Influenced By What Is Around Us

Master and I watched a really good movie today called "City of Joy". It's about a doctor who goes to India and while there tries to help out the locals, although a bit unwillingly at first. It's a damn good movie.

As we were watching it there is one married couple in it, natives of India, and it was interesting to see them interact. She did what her husband told her to do, even if it wasn't what her heart wanted. If she argued a point, it was with a lot of respect. It was incredible to watch, even if it was just acting.

Master and I started to discuss this interaction. And I said, "Well it's how they are. It's what they are brought up to do. You listen to your husband. That's that."

And I went on to say, that that is how women here in America used to be. Seriously. I saw how my great grandparents were. The whole woman's lib thing came about though and now... well. That doesn't happen anymore.

And I'm not saying that it should be that way again, but it is a fine example of how what you are is influenced by what is around you.

I grew up seeing the men supposedly wearing the pants in the family, but once things were more relaxed you could see that the wife was really running the show. That is, except for a few cases in my family. That would be my great grandparents and one of my aunts and her husband.

But in certain cultures it is expected of you to do what your husband tells you. And while some of us submissive type people like to wish we were that way, there are parts of it I know for a fact that I wouldn't be able to tolerate.

"Oh, you want another wife? Rock on .."

No.

"You're fucking around on me? That's cool. I'll just be over here when you want to pay attention to me."

No again.

"Thank you for beating my ass because you were drunk and were sick of kicking the dog."

Nope.

"You're going to cut off my clitoris so I won't feel compelled to cheat on you and then you're going to make me have my face covered all the time? Awesome! Oh.. I can't leave the house without you? Cool! Being a hermit rocks!"

Yeah... no again. I'm not saying, that that is how all marriages work in those particular cultures. But still... it's part of the reality.

And reality sucks.

You know how you watch those pornos, or see those romantic movies, or bondage related movies and you swoon and then you realize, "Wait a damn minute here. That isn't how real life is. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot mother fucker!" And then you feel ripped off. Yeah, that sucks.

But what Master and I do have a balance to our relationship that works for us. Yes, sometimes I know I am not as docile as I should be. And sometimes I wish Master would be a little more Dominant. *shrugs* These things happen.

But I would like to take a page from that beautiful bond of just doing as your husband tells you. Now I'm not saying I would always agree with Him. That's never going to happen. You can't agree with someone all of the time, on every single subject. But taking a simple concept such as this, and applying it to real life are two entirely different things. And I know this.

Perhaps it will please Master if I stop worrying so damn much and just do as I'm told. Am I going to try and debate some things? Probably. Does it mean I'm going to get my way? Nope.

I've been trying to be a good slave and a good wife. I need to try harder.

He hasn't said anything as far as I'm going to be punished or anything along those lines.. but I feel this starting to slip and so I shall take steps to try and prevent it from slipping further. Hey, it's worth a shot right?

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