Romance

I couldn't really think of anything to write today so I took a question from the submissive journal prompts. This one is: "Does romance have it’s place in D/s relationships?"

Well, as I've said in the past Master and I are not "traditionally" romantic. I honestly wouldn't know what to do if Master had me dress extremely nice (as in non-slut gear) and more formal and took me out to a restaurant where you have a wine selection and a full three course meal and the bill was quite pricy. First off, I'd probably be worrying about how expensive it was. I don't like spending a lot of money on food. Anything over $45 for a dinner for both of us is too expensive in my mind. And yes, that includes the tip. And even then the bill really only gets that high because one or both of us orders a Jack and Coke.

So.. I guess we'll go for our version of romantic. Which is back rubs, cuddling and doing things like going to local carnivals and fairs and walking around hand in hand while Master wins me a bear. It probably makes us sound like teenagers but that's what we enjoy.

Do I feel it has a place in the D/s or M/s lifestyle? In ours, yes I feel it does. If other people do not believe it does, then it isn't right for them in their relationship. And I completely understand that. Believe me quite a few people we know find it odd that I'm the one complaining about how expensive something is. *laughs* They told us that normally the husband is complaining about the bill and their wife is complaining that they are too stingy. But that's only the people we know. I'm not saying everyone is like that.

Mean while Master, when we have the money, is more than willing to splurge on me. Mean while I'm looking at it going, "We could do like three things that are less expensive for what this place charges for dinner." *shrugs* That's just how I've always been I guess.

So while I enjoy the structure and the roughness of our dynamic, I also enjoy the softer and more affectionate side of it as well. I don't know how well I'd do if Master was just Mr. Bad Ass all the time and never the guy who holds me or rubs on my back or just wants to put His arm around me when we're out and about just because He wants to. I don't think I would function well in that kind of environment. I think I would eventually shut down completely and just become a "yes man" for lack of a better term. Yes Sir. No Sir. Sorry Sir.

I believe that my emotions would be drained from me simply because they were no longer needed and I'd become a shell. I wouldn't be able to joke around or be affectionate. I would be a thing. And while I enjoy being "forced" to do something, I think if that all that was expected of me.. do this.. do that.. and nothing else I would hate it deep down inside. I also feel that I would one day snap. I don't mean going psycho with a chainsaw or anything. But one day I could see myself suddenly snap out of the shell and go off on Him and leave.

I am madly in love with Master and I honestly can't see my future without Him. However, if He were to take all of the softness, the "romance", and the affection away and were to just use me and twist me into something that just does what it's told and that is literally it's only purpose, I would die inside. And eventually something inside of me would claw it's way out of that "grave" and leave.

So for me, personally, it is an essential part of our dynamic. It's a balance that we attempt to keep as best we can. We don't want to lean too far to one side or the other. We want the best of both sides.