May 24, 2011

Focus

Master and I had a talk not that long ago. We were both stressing out and withdrawing into ourselves and no longer really focusing on each other, our marriage or our dynamic.

It's not that our marriage was in shambles or anything, it's just that we were so focused on all of the outside influences that we weren't acting like we normally do. We weren't as affectionate and our dynamic was in a slump.

Since that talk that took a few days we've been doing a lot better. We've been more affectionate, we've been focusing more on each other and our dynamic. Our sex life is back to where it was. The outside stresses are still there and just as bad as they were, but we're handling it a lot better.

Master has been giving more orders, I've been more docile. I haven't been perfect. I've been bratty and mouthy. I've been in bad moods as has Master. But we move past it a lot faster than we had been. We are trying to correct it as soon as one or both of us notice it.

I feel more at ease when our dynamic is strong and in place. I handle stress better, I don't react so strongly when something is bothering me. I am able to verbalize what is bothering me instead of just digging deeper into my own head and withdrawing more from Master.

One thing we agreed on was that if I focus less on the stress and more on my collar everything will go a lot smoother. Same for Master, if He focuses more on His ownership of me instead of the stress He seems to be able to handle it a lot better as well.

It's a wonderful feeling and hopefully we can keep focused.

Each day I've been attempting to refocus my energy when I feel myself getting really stressed out I start running my fingers across my cuff, my collar and my wedding ring. Anything I can to get myself to remember what is the most important thing. It's more important than any stress or worry. My Master, my Husband, my mate, our marriage and my submission to Him.

Like I said the worries and stress are still there but I'm handling it a lot better. Master seems to be as well. We still get upset, we still get aggravated but we aren't withdrawing from each other and we're not at each other's throats.

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