I don't like "normal" porn. I find it boring actually. This particular porno was not run of the mill one hole one position type porno or anything. It was just the fact that the girls either had too much say in things or they were enjoying themselves far too much.
I prefer some suffering on the women's part. I like seeing that they are not comfortable or that they are surprised by something that is being done. I like seeing that they are unsure if they are enjoying it or not. I like to see them taken down a peg.
That is why I enjoy the Fuck Doll series by Redlight District so much. We used to have more of them but eventually the dvd would get scratched or it would start to malfunction for some other stupid reason and we'd have to throw it out.
I can't find a lot of them anymore. We have two of them currently. I like it because the girls are taken down a peg. Some more than others of course.
I talked to Master about this and He said that maybe it is because I am seeing myself in their place. After all I'm a slave and a masochist. But I don't look at it that way. I never watch it and go, "I wish I were suffering like that." or "I wish Master would do that to me."
It's just the joy of seeing them taken off their high horses. They all start off as trying to be cute and sexy or perhaps even bad asses and in charge in the beginning. Then you cut to the end of the scene and yeah they are smiling but the make-up is running and they have spit and cum all over their face. The smile is covering up all of the painful and degrading things they did during the scene itself.
I like that. I really do. It surprised me at first but ya know, a thought passed my mind. I'm submissive yes, but only to one person. If another Master or Mistress were to walk up to me and start barking orders they would be quick to find out that I'm not one to bite my tongue or to simply obey because they say they are dominant. Oh no. Not me.
There have been times when Master has allowed such things and then yes, I of course obey. But I'm not obeying the person speaking the words at that time. I'm obeying Master as He is the one allowing it.
Aside from my interactions with Master I am not a submissive person. I'm actually a rather in your face person. I'm not an uber bitch or anything like that. I speak my mind and I don't care if anyone agrees with me. I'm not quiet and meek.
Maybe that is why I like seeing girls taken down a peg or too like I do in porn. Only one person can knock me down a peg like that. One. Those girls? Who ever has the check in hand. *smirks*
Maybe I do have a sadistic side to me.
No comments:
Post a Comment