Dressing Slutty

Master and I were joking around a bit yesterday. It turned to sex due to something we were watching. I honestly don't remember what the fuck we were watching but I looked at Him and said, "So, am I getting laid later?" His response was priceless. "Well, that depends on how slutty you dress later." He then waggled His eyebrows and flicked His tongue at me. I had to laugh. He was only half joking though. I probably would have gotten fucked regardless, but I didn't want to take the chance. *winks*

I didn't want to just throw on a piece of lingerie and call it done. I wanted to be at least be a little creative with it. Right before I took my bath I went into the bedroom and dug through everything to find the items I wanted to piece together. Once I had all of it I took my bath and then got dressed.

I don't know why but when I try to get a bit creative with how I'm dressing up for Him I'm a little worried that He's going to walk into the bathroom and see me only half way done. I guess because I want to surprise Him with the finished product.

I did some light make-up first. I put on some eyeshadow, which I hardly ever do, and put on some lip gloss. I don't wear a lot of make-up and honestly hardly ever put it on unless we are going out on a date night or something. But I wanted to add that special little touch to it.

I then put on a top that only covers my tits and even then it's just barely. I tossed on a lace thong. It is an actual thong. It's not crotchless or anything. I almost never wear underwear. I find it uncomfortable. But when I'm wearing professional clothing I put some on. Why? I'm not sure. I just do. Anyway, I had recently purchased these. I bought them because they are lace and as a result do not bother me as much. In fact they are rather comfortable. I put them on because He had seen them on me when I undressed from the job interview I had and He had me spin around in just the thong and loved them. Once those two small pieces were on I put on leg warmers and heels. I pulled the bottom of the leg warmers over the top of the heels.

When I walked out into the living room He was sitting at the computer with His back to me. I walked up behind Him and kissed the top of His head and rested my arms on His shoulders. He asked me why I was standing behind Him, so I stepped into His line of vision. The look in His eyes let me know that He more than approved. He smacked my ass and asked me what I wanted to do. I had walked over to the couch and sat down. I smirked and said, "Well if I said I wanted to fuck You would say no because You want me to stay like this for a while." I don't remember His exact response but either way it led to the bedroom. Apparently He didn't mind jumping into bed right away. He told me to leave the heels on. (Sometimes He wants me to take them off.)

I got comfortable and He came to bed and immediately pulled me to Him. He chomped down on my neck and grabbed my ass. He chewed on my neck for a long time, all the while rubbing His hand all over my ass. The thong was still on but I think He liked feeling that on me.

He pushed me so that I was on my back. He started nipping the front of my neck as well. He commented on how easy it would be to make new holes in my flesh with His teeth. I whimpered but it got my juices flowing more than they already were. He pulled the top down and sucked, licked, bit, and chewed on my tits for a long time. As He was doing so I reached down and stroked His cock. I alternated between fulling stroking Him, just circling the head, gently running my fingers along His shaft, suddenly gripping Him at the base and just tried to keep it interesting and catch Him off guard as to what was going to happen next. By the sounds He was making it was working.

He suddenly sat up, taking His cock out of my reach and told me to slide up. I did as I was told. He gently took my thong off, while I moved my legs up and did my best to assist Him without using my hands. He dipped down and ate me out. After I came He knelt up and motioned for me to suck His cock. As I was doing my best to please Him with my mouth He leaned over, forced my legs apart and ran His fingers across my ass and pussy, spreading my own juices everywhere His fingers went.

Eventually He told me to stop and to get on my back. I again did as I was told, like a good girl. As soon as He entered me I lifted my right leg up, bending it at the knee so that He could go deeper. He groaned and nuzzled the side of my face. After a while I pulled my other leg up as well and bent it at the knee, wrapping my legs around Him.

It didn't take me long to feel the urge to cum starting to build up inside of me. I grabbed the heel of each shoe and pulled my legs up so my feet were up by the tops of His shoulders as He was laying on top of me. It's a damn good thing I'm flexible. He ordered me to cum. As I was in the middle of my orgasm, which seemed to go on forever, I felt His cock start to throb inside of me and heard that familiar growl start from deep within His throat, which just tipped me over the brink and His orgasm just made mine last longer.

After we were done He told me to go ahead and get undressed. So, I probably had the entire outfit on for about 20 minutes before we started fucking and only the thong had been removed before we fucked. Now, some people may think it was pointless to get dressed up in the first place, but not me. He was extremely pleased as was I. I was pleased because He was, and that's all that matters.

Ego

Master has a large ego. *laughs* I know.. a Dominant having a large ego?! Surely you jest! We joke about it all of the time. I tell Him that His ego is the size of the state we live in, if not larger. He tends to just nod His head and agree with me. Other times He'll mockingly look offended by it. Ya know, cause He's a smart ass.

The reason this is being brought up is because of Sunday night. We were both pretty revved up. We were both in the mood for rough sex. That's a pretty regular occurrence, obviously. What with His being a sadist and my being a masochist and all that. But this went a bit beyond the usual. This wasn't just some kink pain. No, He was going for literally making my pussy hurt to the point where I started cramping. I don't know if any other woman gets that or not. But I do. It doesn't happen a lot, but it does happen.

Normally He just wants to make me sore so that I'm swollen and taking a sharp breath when He thrusts into me. But this time He was seriously setting out to make it hurt, and hurt a lot. He flipped me onto my stomach to start and knelt behind me. As soon as He was balls deep inside of me He moved His knees up so that they were against my hips. I don't think He could have gotten any deeper without dislocating my hips. Immediately I hard to take in a very deep breath. It was very sudden and a shock to the system. I was wet, but not dripping wet just yet. Although that didn't take long at all.

And can I just take a moment and say how much I love the fact that He is clean shaven down there? I still have the landing strip but my pussy lips are of course clean shaven. And for whatever reason it was just highly noticeable to me that night. The way everything was just sliding against the other was just... delicious. It mixed very well with the pain.

He had grabbed my shoulders and was propping up His upper body while pinning me to the bed. It may sound odd that I was already in pain from being fucked that deep. He had basically "bottomed out" as soon as He moved His knees up, and each time He thrust His hips He was hitting that spot over, and over again. I loved it.

He ordered me to cum several times. Of course, I got more sensitive with each orgasm. He allowed me one final orgasm before telling me that I was now His toy. As soon as that orgasm ended He rolled onto His side, making sure to pull me with Him so He never slipped out. He crushed my upper body to Him and had my legs sticking straight down and remained just as deep as He was when I was on my stomach. I was starting to cramp. It had turned from delicious pain to the very beginnings of my cramping.

I didn't say anything because I knew that He was aiming for that result. Maybe not the cramping part but definitely more than just my being sore. He knew I was starting to cramp. I mean, how couldn't He? Especially when He's that deep inside of me. He asked me why it every time He makes me hurt like that I seem to want to coat His cock with my juices. Even though it hurt I couldn't help but giggle a bit and say, "I guess because I'm a sick bitch Master." He chuckled one of His very dark chuckles and said, "No, what's sick is how much I enjoy hurting you."

He asked me if it was starting to become a little too much. Before I could answer He followed up with telling me to be honest rather than trying to be a "bad ass" and prove that I could power through it. I told Him that yes, it was getting to be a bit much. So He took one of my legs and held it up a bit so He wasn't quite as deep. It still hurt but the cramping stopped.

It didn't take long after that before He had my stomach again, but this time He had one of my legs straight back and the other one bent at the knee and out from underneath His body. He knelt behind me again as He pumped in and out of me. I began to beg for His cum. I begged Him to coat me where it hurt. He growled and pushed forward as far as He possibly could. I took in a sharp breath and my eyes went wide, but I enjoyed every single second, ever single pulse of His cock.

Afterward He rested His lower body against me but kept His upper body propped up by His arms. He asked how I was doing. I simply said, "Amazing!" He laughed and said, "I know I was." See! There is that ego! Not that He was wrong.... but that's not the point. *smirks* He playfully smacked me on the ass and rolled off of me. He held me for a little while afterward. I was cum drunk, that's for damn sure.

I Wanna Fuck

Have you ever been horny for absolutely no reason at all? Nothing really triggers it sometimes. Today is a good example. We were just sitting around watching TV and once whatever episode of whatever show was done Master looked at me and asked me what I wanted to do. So I just took a few steps to where He was sitting, knelt at His side, wrapped my arms around Him and said, "I wanna fuck." He shook His head and said, "I don't even know why I asked."

He knows that sometimes it just hits me like a ton of bricks for absolutely no reason what so ever. And it had. So He told me to go to the bedroom and that He would be right there. I had just gotten comfortable when He walked in and got comfortable next to me.

He quickly pulled me onto my side and crushed me to Him. He chomped down on my neck and took His time chewing in one spot, then dragging His teeth down to where He wanted to bite down on next.

There are times where He bites me and it hurts like hell. It still hurts in a good way, but the pain is more of a shock to my system. And then there are times, like today, where it just causes me to moan and helps me float off into nothing but sensation. Everything else is pretty much blocked out.

The sex was rough and deep. The only hiccup was when one or both of us moved and suddenly my clit hood piercing moved way wrong. Ow. It took me a moment to recover. It was not a good kind of pain. Master didn't stop but He did make sure I was okay and moved so that there wasn't any pressure on it. It didn't ruin anything, thankfully.

He allowed me to cum several times including when He was about to get off. Right before my orgasm hit me full force I felt His cock start to throb as His orgasm peaked, which just sent me over the brink. It was amazing.

After we were done and we were laying next to one another I didn't want to move except to stretch. Master had His arm resting against my stomach and I was just so damn comfortable. We stayed like that for about five minutes, then He told me to get up and go to the living room. I grumbled a little bit and He just chuckled and told me to stop pouting.

Inner Night Owl

Well, I got some good news today... or yesterday... whatever. I'm making this post a little after midnight. I called unemployment to see if they had made a decision on whether or not I was approved for unemployment and I was! I'm honestly amazed at how nice people are on the unemployment assistance line. I don't know why I thought they would be dicks but so far everyone I have talked to has been extremely helpful and pleasant to speak with. Last week was what they call a "wait week", which basically means that I will not be receiving a payment for that week. It was my first full week of being unemployed. However, once I file my weekly claim this upcoming Sunday I should receive a payment early next week. That took a lot off of my mind. Last night I had gone to bed earlier than I have been since being fired and it was because my stomach was upset. I didn't feel sick and I didn't really understand why my stomach felt like it was doing flips so I figured I would just sleep it off.

This morning when I woke up and after I called unemployment it dawned on me that it was because I realized I wouldn't be getting a paycheck next Friday. Never mind I know that I'm no longer working and have been sitting at home for the past two weeks. I'm not sure why all of a sudden my brain decided to bring that to my attention. I told Master about it. He said I am to tell Him such things when they happen and I quickly explained that I didn't even know why my stomach felt like that until this morning. He understood since that does happen to me from time to time. I hate that about myself but there isn't much I can do about it.

At least now I know for sure that I will be getting the unemployment rather than sitting here for three weeks, like they had originally quoted me, before finding out their decision. It feels like a giant weight being lifted off of my shoulders.

Since I have been fired I noticed that my inner night owl is in high gear. I haven't been going to bed any earlier than 2am. The latest I've stayed up is about 4:30am. I figure that I don't really have any reason to go to bed at a half way decent time and Master is no longer enforcing a bed time since I no longer have a 45 minute drive waiting for me in the morning.

I can do my job searches at any point, as well as apply to jobs, so there is really no need for me to get up at 6am every day. *shrugs* Then again I'm not really sleeping in all that late given what time I'm going to bed. And if I need to get up to do something I still set the alarm and get up. No biggie. I've always said that I'm a night owl and this just proves it. Oddly enough I'm still hoping for a first shift job. I'm applying to second shift jobs as well. I haven't seen any third shift jobs that I would qualify for though. Other wise I'd apply to those as well.

Aside from running the errands that need to be done, doing the normal daily stuff, and applying to jobs I have just been trying to keep my mind busy. I have quickly realized that I don't have any real hobbies. I never had time for them before. And now that I do have time I can't really think of anything I want to do. Apparently I'm rather fucking boring. Who knew.

I read one of the books we have. We have quite a few actually, and there is one that I haven't read all of the way. But I don't really feel like reading it. In fact, once I was done with the one I just finished I didn't really feel like reading any of the books we have. *shrugs* Not sure why.

Really, the only "hobby" I've had is coding and tweaking code. I don't have anything to do that with except this blog. And I just tweaked some of the coding with this blog not that long ago. And I like the way it is. So... that's out. Master doesn't blog anymore and hasn't for at least two years now.. probably longer... so there is no need to code anything for Him. There is no need for me to create a new blog as this one covers everything.

As a result I'm basically filling the free time I do have with watching things on Netflix and You Tube. I also check my social media stuff and play little mini games on my cell phone.

Gas prices are high and since the income has now dropped significantly it's not like I can just go for a drive and it's not nice enough out yet to go for a walk or just sit outside. Even though I hate hearing our neighbors and there isn't really much to do on the porch I would love to just sit outside for a while. I would also love to go on long walks with Master and our mutt.

My dad did say that he wants to come up in a couple of weeks, so that will be something to break up the routine a bit. My brother also stated that he wants to come up sometime soon, he just doesn't know when it will be feasible.

My mother-in-law wants us to come down to visit but as I pointed out, the gas prices are not allowing that. My sister-in-law stated that I should enjoy the down time. I guess I see where she is coming from since I had been wanting an extended break from work, but not like this. And the stress levels are making it pretty impossible to actually enjoy the down time. I don't really find being unemployed enjoyable. I know she meant well though. It's not like I'm mad about it or anything.

*sigh* Oh well. I've rambled on here enough for now.

Updates

I'm officially 31 now. Hooray or something. I got a lot of happy birthdays on the social media site I'm on. My mom called me to say happy birthday and a little later in the day so did my father.

I got fucked as soon as Master woke up, so that was a nice morning quickie. The rest of the day, aside from phone calls, was pretty much uneventful. That is until we went out to dinner. We couldn't quite afford the place we had originally been thinking of like I thought we could. But that's okay. We went to a different one and the food was still really good and we had a good time sitting there talking for a while. We didn't stay long after we were done eating, like we normally do. I had a pressure headache creeping up on me and I didn't want it turning into a migraine. And of course I hadn't brought any advil with me. Normally I have some in my purse. I still enjoyed it though.

I got a back massage from Master while we were watching a movie and then I worked on His for a little while. So like I said it was rather uneventful but I still enjoyed it. I'm not complaining at all.

I am finding it harder and harder to find ways to keep myself entertained now that I'm unemployed. It hasn't even been a full two weeks yet. Well, tomorrow it will be. I've been doing job searches, obviously. I'm keeping track of them in an excel sheet for unemployment purposes. I haven't heard anything from them yet. The lady I spoke to last week said it could take up to three weeks. But I have decided I'm going to call once a week just to see what's going on. I'm not very good at sitting back and waiting to see how things pan out.

I had to pay cash for my medication yesterday. I don't have health insurance anymore, obviously. I'm signing up for a program via the medicine manufacturer. But that won't kick in for a while. I can't afford to not take my pills. I don't even know what kind of mess I'd be. I don't know if there is any kind of withdrawal from it since it is a drug that builds up in your system. I think my stress levels at that point would eat me from the inside.

I was getting my medicine, when I had health insurance, from Walgreens. So I called them and asked them how much it would cost for one month in cash. $180.00. Are you fucking serious? This is for the generic for crying out loud. I would hate to know what they would charge for the name brand. My mom told to call the Pick N Save pharmacy to see what they charged. So I did. Yeah... hell of a difference. For the same fucking pills it was $25.00 for a month supply. Holy fucking shit. I transferred my prescription over there immediately.

Like I said though I have no idea what kind of fresh hell I'd be mentally put through if I didn't have my medication. I think I'd be mush at this point. I'm dealing pretty well with the whole being unemployed thing and the stress that comes with it while on my medication. Don't get me wrong, the stress is there. Believe me. But I'm not letting it turning me into a sobbing mess in the corner of a dark room. I'm okay actually. But without the meds I think I would literally not want to get out of bed. I don't think I'd have any motivation of any kind what so ever. That's all guess work, but given how my I reacted to things in the past while depressed, I think that is a pretty accurate guess.

I'm just lucky to have the support system that I do. Hopefully something will pan out soon.

Now, for an update on my grandfather..

Apparently the information we received from my uncle was wrong. When I got a hold of my father it was all straightened out. Yes, his heart beat was at 155 and they had to knock him out, shock him, and wake him up in order to get it regular again. His organs were not attacking themselves. His heart was enlarged and out of place due to the swelling.

His insurance wouldn't cover much more of a stay so he was sent home last Saturday. His neighbors are constantly checking in on him. Our family members call him several times a day. He has a nurse and a physical therapist going out there once a day... etc...

We have him as closely monitored as we can without someone actually moving in with him, which he will not allow.

His doctor did remind my father than his last surgery was 15 years ago, and at that time they stated that after that surgery they wouldn't be able to do anything else. And they stand by that. From this point forward all they can do is what they just did (shock his heart to get it to go to a normal rhythm) or just make him comfortable. His body cannot handle another surgery.

My dad says he has a really bad feeling deep down in his gut. He had this same exact feeling about three weeks before my grandmother passed away. At this point we can't do anything but wait to see how Grandpa's heart holds out. That's all we can do so that's all we're doing.

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is my birthday. I'll be 31. Hooray. Seriously though I don't care that I'll be 31. It's no different than when I turned 30, or 29, or 28... etc. I'm not one of those girls who really cares about my age. I'll say the same thing when I turn 40. I don't care.

And I never really want anything for my birthday. Not that long ago my mother had taken me dress clothes shopping and counted that as part of my birthday present, which was awesome! When she said "part of" I told her that she didn't need to get me or give me anything else. I was more than happy with what she had just done. I figured that was that. No biggie. Well, over this past weekend I went down to visit her for a while. And of course she didn't listen. She ended up giving me some birthday money as well.

She stood there with the money in her hand and looked me in the eye as she said, "This is not for you to use for the household. This is not something to use for bills. This is for something you want." Basically she didn't want me to spend it on necessities. She understands that I'm unemployed and all that but she also wants me to use the money for a little splurge as I never, ever do that. Even when I was working I never really bought anything for myself. That's just how I am.

I'm so bad at spending money on myself (unless it's for a tattoo) that I have literally been trying to figure out what the hell I'm going to use the money on since she gave it to me. I'm not kidding. I would think of something and then have to throw that idea away because it was something that fell under a need rather than a want.

We went down to the store and tried finding a movie or something that I would like to watch and own. We couldn't find anything. I would see something and go, "Yeah I liked the movie but not enough to own it." Or it would be something I had never seen before and didn't want to waste money on in case I didn't like it.

We came home empty handed. I apologized to Master for dragging Him out of the house when it was so cold out but He said it wasn't a big deal at all. I apologize for some weird shit, let me tell ya. Normally it's for something out of my control or something that isn't my fault. I'm fucked up like that.

I was disappointed because I kind of felt like I would just end up spending the money on something needed for the household simply because I couldn't think of a damn thing I wanted. And that would piss my mom off. And Master wouldn't have been too happy about it either.

Once we got home I finally figured out what I wanted. I wanted a date night with my Husband. It's something I want and it's something we haven't done in a very, very long time. There aren't any movies out in theaters that either of us want to see, so we'll be just going out to dinner. It may sound stupid, but Master and I haven't had a date night in I can't tell you how long and I'm not sure when we'll be able to any time soon simply because of finances. So, using my birthday money for it makes perfect sense.

We'll probably go a little earlier than we would normally eat at home, like we normally do. And since it'll be a Tuesday night it shouldn't be very busy. I already picked out where we are going and Master seemed very pleased by it because He loves the restaurant. I'm looking forward to it.

Yes, we could have just gone tonight but I really want to do it on my actual birthday.

Broken Record

Yesterday was the last day my insurance was valid so I was glad that I could squeeze in one last appointment with my shrink. We spoke about ways to keep my medication going without costing me an arm and a leg. He gave me some paperwork so I can contact the manufacturer of the medication. They have a program where you can get the medicine at no cost if you qualify. Well, since I just lost my job and I no longer have insurance, my shrink thinks I have a pretty good chance at getting it. He had already filled out his portion, which had to include a six month prescription. So now all I have to do is fill out my portion and mail it in. My shrink told me to come see him again in six months. He didn't make a set appointment with me because we both wanted to see when I would find a job and have insurance kick in so we know what insurance is and is not going to cover. Basically he told me to call once it gets close to the six month and we'll go from there.

Master had read my blog post from two nights ago and He said He isn't surprised by how well I'm handling everything. He said He is proud of me though. That made me feel good.

Even though I'm not going to bed until about 3am each night I still have this feeling like I have to get up to go to work. For instance, it's Saturday and I feel like I have to get up at 6am on Monday. Obviously I don't. Hopefully it won't stay like that for long. Hopefully I'll have a new job in the very near future.

I'm tossing out my resume like it's going out of style. I hadn't heard anything from the place that I had an interview at on Monday. They had said they would have a decision by the end of the week. I was staring at my phone all day willing it to ring. Nothing.

I was disappointed but part of me is still holding out hope. That may be stupid, but I don't care. So last night I sent an e-mail to the person I had the interview with and basically thanked her for the interview and professionally inquired as to whether or not a decision had been made regarding the job. My mother had suggested that I called and asked, but I thought an e-mail would be better. It just seemed more professional to me for some reason. I guess maybe I feel that it isn't as bothersome to the other person? Also, I don't have to worry about playing phone tag.

I know this blog has been all about work, unemployment, etc and so on. But honestly that's all that has been swimming around in my head since last Thursday. I'm sure it's boring to read but writing about it is helping me in a way. I guess it just acts as something to blurt it out on so I'm not keeping it in my brain or sounding like a completely broken record when talking to people. Instead, I can be a broken record on my blog.