Milestone

Yesterday was our anniversary. Unfortunately it wasn't eventful. There really wasn't anything we could do. We had things we wanted to do... but they just weren't feasible. *sad face* I mean it's our anniversary, it's not like we have to do anything. Anniversaries aren't about presents and all that. Hell, I didn't even want and/or expect a present. All I wanted was to be able to celebrate in some way.

But... we couldn't. Due to my being unemployed things are tight. Extremely tight. And as a result there wasn't anything we could really do to celebrate. So it was spent like any other day.

Am I mad? No.

Am I frustrated? Yes.

Am I disappointed? Yes.

Do I blame Him or myself? No.

I think I am more frustrated just by the simple fact that in the beginning of February I had requested three days off from work around our anniversary so we could celebrate. And I specifically planned it for a time when we would have a little money to celebrate with. Obviously those plans were made before I was fired. And once I was fired those plans were shot.

We have been together for eleven years now, seven of which we have been married. We decided to get married on our "normal" anniversary just to keep things nice and simple. Master made a photo album on the social media site we are on. Basically it is a collection of select photographs of us over the years. It was really sweet of Him and it was fun to look through.

I guess I'm just a bit down about the fact that there wasn't anything special I could do for Him. We didn't have the money for any kind of date night. We didn't have the money for anything to make the day at least a little special.

I'm not going to say this anniversary sucked. It is still a milestone in our marriage/relationship. So it can't suck. I will say that it sucked that we couldn't make it special and had to basically do what we do every day. Usually when things are tight I can pull something out of my ass and make it work, but with my not having a normal paycheck it's impossible. There was no robbing Peter to pay Paul this time.

Regardless, I am thankful that we have reached this milestone together. I know we have many more ahead of us. And I will be doing everything I can to make sure that next year we actually get to celebrate it.