Family

I talked to my dad a little bit yesterday. I was looking for an update on my grandfather. He gave me one... it wasn't a really good one but it wasn't a really bad one either. I guess the nurse that goes out there talked to my dad and told him that Grandpa isn't taking all of his medications and that the ones he is taking, he isn't taking properly. So Dad talked to Grandpa about it and to make a long story short, Grandpa basically said that he'll take the medications he wants to when he wants to. He then proceeded to say that it's been 20 years since he lost his wife (my grandmother) and he misses her and all he wants to do is be with her. He's tired. My dad told me that he isn't going to shove the pills down his throat and that Grandpa has always been a very stubborn man and once he puts his foot down about something there is no changing his mind. My father is the exact same way.

Grandpa is basically just doing what he has to and that is it. His mind and spirit are ready to let go but his body isn't. It's not like he isn't going to take care of something drastic, which is why he went to the ER that one day. But I think that is more due to his religious beliefs. He doesn't want to risk not going to heaven since he then wouldn't be with Grandma. He did make sure that my father knows that he has a DNR in order. My dad wanted to let me know as well so I'm not surprised by it. The nurse basically is saying that Grandpa will go sooner rather than later. She is stating within a month or two. That could be true or he could still be here this time next year. I don't think he wants to be though. I think if he passed away tomorrow he would be happy. That may sound horrible, but it's the truth.

I was doing okay after the conversation. At one point I did break down a little bit. I cried. I wasn't sobbing, but tears were rolling down my face. Master came over to me and held my hand until I calmed down a bit. I actually got myself under control faster than I normally do.

The other part of the conversation while we were on the phone my dad had mentioned that he wanted to come up this weekend but his back wasn't up to sitting in the car that long. Well shit.. I've been wanting out of the apartment so that was a good reason to do so.

Master and I went down there today. My dad had more things that he wanted to put up on e-bay, so we brought down the camera. Master took the pictures and I wrote everything down. I'll be putting all of that up tomorrow. We didn't get home until 6pm. That's not late at all, especially given the fact that I haven't been going to bed until 3am. I only went to bed at 2am last night because I was bored. But I wanted to keep it for tomorrow so I have something to do and also because I have to do some research on the items. It's going to be a bit of process. It'll take up a couple of hours tomorrow.

We had a good time at my dad's though. It's good to spend time with my dad right now. My dad and I are very close. Not in a typical father/daughter relationship fashion but still... we're close. He is more like one of my best friends that I can joke around with for hours at a time.

That sounds weird doesn't it? Yes, yes it does. It's going to be difficult for me when he moves out of state. I know I'll still be able to talk to him whenever I want, but I won't be able to take a short drive and see him whenever I want. I am very close to my parents. I am also very close with my mother, but it is more of a parent/friend mix of a relationship. My dad only really steps up to the parent role when it is needed. He has done that since I hit 18. Once I became an adult he has wanted to be my friend more than my parent. Which is fine. I'm used to it. I'm not holding that against him at all. It's just how he is.

He is dead set on moving though. His back is too bad. He can't handle the winters up here anymore. And where he would be moving their version of winter is closing down the city if there is a light dusting of snow and it doesn't get nearly as cold as it does up here. We'll be in the 20's up here and they'll have a 60°day. He was hoping to move before winter hits later this year, but he doesn't think that is going to be possible. Also, with the recent developments with Grandpa he said he would feel guilty if he moved before he passed away. I can understand that.

So... yep. That's all I have for now.