What It Means To You

I was reading on the boards the other day and came across one that stated that her Master wouldn't marry her because then they could no longer be in the lifestyle, since marriage is an equal partnership and there for he would no longer have control over her.

Chuckling to myself just a little bit I responded, of course.

Master and I were in this power exchange dynamic extremely early on in our relationship. I would say a good six months in? It started off gradually but then it grew into what it is today. We had been together for four years by the time we got married.

Since when did anyone say that every marriage has to be an equal partnership? If that were the case none of the slaves I've read on blogs would be married or engaged for that matter. In times go by it was actually never an equal partnership. If you want to go old school about it the man was in charge and the wife was submissive to him.

Now, I won't say that we have that sort of marriage because we don't. I'm not submissive to Him only because I'm His wife. I was submissive to Him long before that ring went on my finger. I do not personally feel that our getting married lessened our dynamic in any way, shape, or form. If anything it strengthened it. It put a legal spin on things.

Another person had commented on the same thread that a slave and Master shouldn't get married because the slave then has access to their Master's assets. What does that have to do with anything? If you are submissive to your Husband would it matter if you had access? I have access to His and He has access to mine. Big deal. If anything to be marriage has made the legal side of things a hell of a lot easier. He has say over what happens to me if something were to go horribly wrong. On the flip side of that I also have that legal right but I would still be acting on what I know His wishes to be.

I was also able to take on His last name. I took His last name fully. I did not hyphenate it. Now, I know that if the unthinkable were to happen and we ended up getting a divorce I would go back to my maiden name. That was actually agreed upon before we said our vows. I would no longer be His and I would no longer be a part of that family, so why would I keep His last name? That makes no sense to me to begin with to be perfectly honest with you.

Marriage is what you make it. Not all marriages are the same just like not ever power exchange relationship is the same. There may be similarities, true. But there will always be something different, something unique.

Your relationship, regardless of the situation, is what you make it. It all depends on what you put into it, what your partner puts into it and where you take it together.

So to say that Master no longer owns me simply because I am also His wife is rubbish.