I do have to say though that having this structured dynamic is helping me. I don't know how I would be right now if I knew I didn't have structure at home. I don't know if it's just how I am, if it's part of my being bipolar, or a combination of the two but I need that in my life. I can't imagine not having it. We've been doing this for so many years that if it were to stop now I don't think I could cope very well.
Master has been more forceful lately. It's what I need right now. Never mind it shows through more in the bedroom. Sometimes that's where I need it most. Sex is a stress reliever to begin with. Add to that the fact that He is rough with me and barks orders... it's a stress reliever and a showing of who's in charge. What can be better than that?
Well, it's best for me anyway. I know not everyone is wired that way.
But I think it's best for Master too. He always seems more content afterward. And I know it's not just from getting off.
We're both more frisky when the sex has been more forceful too. And I like it when we're frisky.
It's like we were made for this dynamic. If we went full on "vanilla" I don't think we would be very happy. I don't think I would be as balanced as I am right now. We'd be fighting a lot more, I'm pretty sure of that.
We can both be rather opinionated and have strong personalities in general. So if we didn't have the dynamic there would most likely be some kind of power struggle and that just wouldn't end well for anyone involved.
I'm just thankful that we both recognized how we naturally interact with one another early on in our relationship. Granted it hasn't always been easy but it built a stable foundation which we have built this relationship off. It was a good, solid beginning and as a result we have a good solid relationship. Trust me, there are a lot of things that would have torn us apart if we hadn't had that foundation early on. I can almost guarantee that.
But we do. And here we are.
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